Mysterious, Generous, Beautiful Kindness

Kindness Activist learned of a death in the “family” today. 

I am sorry to share that the beloved, magical, and mysterious E.A. Raven has died.

E.A. Raven was what could be called the “patron saint” of Kindness Activist.  She contributed so much over the last 10 months.

And yet – she remained a mystery. 

We never met.  I was never sure how she had found out about our work. 

But she was one of the most enthusiastic supporters ever.

I think it all started in December of 2022.  The annual Santa Project was underway – an event that invites children to write and mail letters to the North Pole right from our house in South Arlington, Virginia.  In 2022, 229 letters were written to Santa.  And each and every one of those children who wrote received a personal letter from Santa and at least one gift that they had asked for (most kids got 2 or 3 things).

The Santa Project is a herculean task, and last year I harnessed the power of the people and ASKED FOR HELP.  I made an Amazon wish list with things the letter writers were asking for and shared the link to the list.

That’s when the magic started.

Packages started arriving with Amazon notes signed “E.A. Raven”.  And not just one package, no, the mystery donor granted wish after wish after wish.  I was astounded and oh so thankful.

But the deliveries didn’t stop after Christmas was over.  Instead, they became even more frequent…  E.A. Raven would send food and toiletries to help stock the Little Yellow Free Pantry, a pantry outside our home that helps neighbors experiencing food insecurity make ends meet.  E.A. Raven followed the wish list for the Little Yellow Pantry and sent so, so, so many wonderful things.

One thing I loved about her gifts for the pantry is that she was not judgmental in the least.  Many people who donate food wouldn’t think to donate something “extravagant” like jelly or cake frosting or cookies.  But E.A. Raven and I agreed – everybody deserves good food, and that includes a treat now and then.  Food pantries shouldn’t be just cans of tuna and green beans.

She and I developed a friendship, I like to think.  A friendship, even though we never met. 

And even though I didn’t know who this beautiful human was. 

I don’t know how she found out about Kindness Activist.  Maybe she saw the story on CBS News?  Maybe she read a piece in the Washington Post?  However she heard about our mission, she was 100% on board and supported our work with a passion.

I didn’t have any way to communicate with E.A. Raven.  Well, no way except to scan the codes on the Amazon gift notes included in the boxes and write her thank you notes.  I loved writing them.  I would thank her for whatever she sent, then sometimes tell her about the weather we were having.  Remind her how grateful we were for her donations.  Sometimes my messages were too long (there is a character limit to Amazon thank you s) and I would have to write “cont” on one and write more on the next note. 

I tried to get some details from her, to solve the mystery.  I wanted to send her a Kind Is Cool t-shirt – asked her size and where to send it.  No reply. 

 

I must confess that my friends and I were a bit obsessed about this stranger.  We fantasized about who this wonderful woman must be.  At first, we thought she was using a nom de plume – after all – E. A. Raven sounds a bit like Edgar Allen (Poe), author of The Raven…

 

I resorted to Googling her.  I found a Facebook page that I thought was hers that was meant to showcase her writing, but it was closed.  Still, I sent a message.  No response. 

 

I found some information online about a person who I thought was her…  Perhaps this was her – a woman who held a patent…

 

But really, the mystery was part of the allure.  Not knowing who she was somehow made the boxes and boxes and boxes that arrived full of donations even more special.

 

A few months ago, one of the notes included with a donation explained that she was going to be in the hospital having a procedure done.  I was worried, as were the members of the Pantry Crew.  We wanted to send her flowers and a get well card.  I asked again for her address in a thank you, no reply.

 

She didn’t send any donations for about a month after the surgery.  We were nervous – was she ok??? 

 

Because you see, it was not the donations we were missing.  It was our friend.  Our far away, never before seen, mysterious magical friend.

 

She sent a few more things.  She included a sweet note that said she was in rehab now and it was difficult to order off Amazon using her phone.  I wished on a star for her to get well.

 

Today I got an email from another stranger, E.A. Raven’s sister.  She broke the news: “My sister Betty Raven loved donating items to your charity.  Sadly, she passed a week ago.  I wanted to inform you so that you understand why she stopped donating.”

 

I cried.  Cried for a woman I had never met but was so very thankful for.  I asked her sister when the memorial service would be because I hoped I could take time to go and honor her.  Sadly, the services have already happened.  And strangely, she died on Mary Day, the anniversary of my mom’s death in 2002.

 

Her sister sent a link to the obituary.  It was not until her death that I found out exactly who E.A. Raven was.  And boy oh boy, was she a powerhouse.  She paved the way for women who followed in her footsteps.  I wish I could have met her.  I think we would’ve gotten along swimmingly.

 

Rest in peace, E.A. Raven.  You brightened our lives with your mystery.  You made us smile with your sweet notes.  You taught us that we can be friends with those we have never met.  You fed many, many people in this community.  You were a shining example of KINDNESS. 

 

Thank you.

Here is a link to her inspirational obituary:  E.A. Raven

Number 365

Our Delegate to the Virginia Assembly, Alfonso Lopez, stopped by this evening.  His mission was to put up a yard sign on our busy corner (we are squarely in his team so he knows that ask gets a “yes”). 

But while he was here, we took time to chat.  Talked about the upcoming elections.  Talked about the repair to the porch David is working on.  Talked about the family arriving in America soon that needs temporary housing.  What an honor to have direct access to someone who represents us in government.  Not all Americans have that privilege, and I am thankful we do.

As we talked, I remembered that I have never shared an important story that involves Alfonso.  There are many reasons it has not been written about – time to sit down and compose being a factor.  But the main reason is this:  talking about yourself is difficult.  It can come across as boasting, which is a trait that I do not admire. 

But then I thought, by NOT sharing this story, I am not giving Alfonso the gratitude and respect that he deserves for honoring me in such a special and significant way.  And by not sharing it, I miss an opportunity to spread some kindness ripples. 

So – here’s the story…

On February 12, 2023 we hosted the 2^nd birthday party for the Little Yellow Free Pantry.  I invited the community, and my sister even flew in from Omaha to be a part of the celebration.  We had hoped for a sunny, chilly day full of laughter and cupcakes and cookies.  Instead, what we got was a very cold, rainy day – but still full of laughter and cupcakes and cookies.

It rained super hard.  We had a canopy set up and guests huddled under it around the fire pit.  Kids created crafts (with glitter, lots of glitter!!) on the covered back porch.  We drank hot cocoa and hot tea.  One of David’s jobs was to periodically poke the underside of the canopy with a broom handle to move the puddles that had formed onto the ground.  Once the puddle he was getting rid of splashed right into the firepit – smoke and ashes flew everywhere.  Cue the laughter…

One pantry guest who is without housing came by to get food and we invited him into the celebration.  He sat right down and chatted with the other everyone.  It was a cold day, but fun.

Late in the afternoon, State Representative Alfonso Lopez showed up.  And he brought with him a large blue folder, inside of which was a formal print of House Joint Resolution 365 – commending me, Susan Thompson-Gaines, for my work as a Kindness Activist.  Makes me tear up even thinking about it.

I don’t do this work for accolades.  I don’t do it to be recognized or applauded. 

I do kindness work because it makes my heart happy, and it makes the world a kinder place.  And really, don’t we all want happy hearts and a kind place to live?

Alfonso read the resolution aloud, and a kind neighbor videoed some of it and shared it with me, which I will share in the link here.

Alfonso Lopez Reading House Joint Resolution No. 365

Thank you Alfonso.  I am humbled and I am honored.  Maybe someday I will have an actual Kindness Activist OFFICE instead of working off the very full dining room table at home.  When that happens I can frame and hang this beautiful piece of parchment and hang it on the wall.

Until then, I will keep up the kindness.  Even on days when it is hard, and there feels like too much to juggle.  I would like to think that me finding this passion and diving into it so deeply would make my parents proud.  Wish they could see this Joint Resolution…  My dad would’ve photocopied this puppy 2 dozen times and handed out copies to all of his buddies (he might’ve even faxed it to a few of them…), and my mom most certainly would’ve cried when she saw it.

Go out there and be kind, friends.  It doesn’t cost you anything.  And it can honestly make a dent in changing the world.

Thanks. 

 

P.S. – I just noticed tonight that it is House Joint Resolution Number 365.  I think that means 365 days in a year.  As in, be kind 365.

 

#KindnessActivist   #JustBeKind   #BeKind365

 

Chips of Kindness

I put out a call recently asking for donations for the Little Yellow Free Pantry that we have outside our home, a pantry that feeds so many people in the community. 

And many, many people heard the call and responded.  Thank you. 

The donations have been coming in, making me smile each and every time.  The shelves in our basement that hold pantry supplies are no longer bare.  My wish was that we could stock up really good NOW, in October and November.  Because once the “busy season” starts (the annual Santa Project, where kids come to our home and write and mail letters to Santa, then he writes each and every one back and gets them something they asked for), I won’t have the time or energy to focus on the pantry.  It has to be ready to sort of “run itself” for that period.   

I wanted to take a moment to tell you the story of a new pantry guest.  I love to share stories of people who visit the pantry so that you have an idea of where the amazing things you donate are going.

A new guest showed up recently.  She is a sweet woman, tiny in stature, an immigrant.  She moved into the community with her son not long ago.  I saw her at the pantry and went up to talk.  She is very quiet and reserved. 

I explained that the food was for everyone.  She smiled and lowered her head, shaking it to say “no”.  I tried again.  “No, really, it is free!  It is for everyone, please take what you would like.”  Again, a shy “no”.

She asked if I knew of a place that she might be able to rent and explained that she and her child are currently living in a nearby hotel, which is eating up all of the money they have.  The boy is enrolled in school and she would like to stay in the same district.  I told her I would put some feelers out to see if I could find any leads.  She left with just a couple of cans of food.

I saw her again a few days later.  Again, I offered food, and again, she shyly declined.  But then she explained that she felt bad taking the food without giving something in return.  Was there anything she could do to help, she asked.

We agreed that she would come back the next day and volunteer.  Before she left, I begged her to take some food.  The only thing she asked for was CHIPS for her son.  “He likes chips,” she said quietly.  I rushed to the storage area and came back with chips, soup, chili, tuna, and a few other cans.  She was embarrassed to be offered so much.  “Give it to others, please, share with others,” she told me.  She left with a few cans of food and bags of the coveted chips.

She came back the next day just as she promised.  I put her to work hanging up many Halloween costumes that had been donated.  She did a terrific job getting them all organized. 

This woman is someone who benefits from your generosity.  This proud, shy, smart, scared woman.  She is starting life over here with her child.  And because of generous donors to the Little Yellow Free Pantry, she knows she has a safety net and does not need to go to bed hungry.

I have a lead on an apartment for her thanks to an amazing realtor.  I hope to see her again soon so that I can share it.  Our community needs people like her.  People brave enough to uproot themselves and move to a new place to find a better life.  People willing to help out and give back.  People with heart.

Thank you for being so supportive of the work of Kindness Activist.  Because of YOU, we can create kindness ripples one at a time.

If you would like to donate to the Little Yellow Free Pantry, the Amazon wish list can be found here: Little Yellow Free Pantry Wish List

We are currently low on honey, single serving cups of soup of any kind, and peanut butter.  We need canned meat of any kind and soup of any kind.