Snowflakes of Kindness

Last year around this time I was gearing up to march in the Women’s March in Washington DC.  I had ideas on what I wanted to paint on my sign, but I do not know how to knit and therefore didn’t plan on adorning my head with one of the iconic hats of the march.  I didn’t plan on it, that is, until someone I had met only one time in my life asked if I would like her to knit one for me…  I was blown away by the kindness, and you can bet I was proud as punch to pull that hat on the day of the march and join thousands of other people in the streets.*

Fast forward one year…  I was reading through the online discussion about the Women’s March on Washington 2018: March to the Polls.  Part of the discussion was about attire, and the idea of wearing SNOWFLAKES surfaced.  The concept was to sew or pin snowflakes to coats, hats, mittens, whatever, and OWN THE SNOWFLAKE LABEL.  Not only own it, but show the world that a blizzard is-a-comin’, and everyone had better get prepared!  In the snowflake discussion thread I saw a woman asking if anyone would like her to crochet snowflakes for them.

Could it be?  Could crafty women be willing to share their talents with complete (and/or nearly complete) strangers just for the sake of camaraderie and kindness???  First, I quickly wrote a “Me please!!” message to make sure I didn’t miss out on the generous offer, then I sent a private message to the kind woman behind the snowflakes, Julie.  I had to know why she was willing to go out of her way and use her time and talents to adorn women she didn’t know!

Beautiful, handmade snowflakes!  Aren't they amazing?

Once she was finished crocheting, Julie wrote me back.  She is a kindness inspiration! 

Julie explained that she got the idea to make the snowflakes on Facebook.  “I saw that someone posted the idea of wearing snowflakes (to embrace the ‘liberal snowflake’ insult and make it our own) and I thought, ‘I'm going to do that!’,” she told me.  “Then I saw that someone else posted about looking to buy some snowflakes, and it occurred to me that I could make them for more than just me and my friends, so I offered them up to anyone who wanted them.”  Did you catch that?  She was already going to make them for her group of friends, but she opened up the offer to complete strangers!  Isn’t that awesome?? 

And it wasn’t only Julie.  Her 11 year old son Zachary got involved, too!  He made an illustration that she included with each envelope of snowflakes, and he also helped package and mail all of them out.  Way to use your own creativity and kindness, Zachary!

Artwork by Zachary, included with each and every snowflake!  :)

And before you get to thinking that this was a light snow fall, no, this was a BLIZZARD.  Julie crocheted and mailed out around 90 snowflakes, and she is making 50 more to hand out in person at the march!!!  Imagine the smiles on strangers faces when Julie walks up to them on march day with a handmade snowflake to wear!  I asked her how this act of kindness makes her feel, and she said, “It makes me feel great! I love being able to contribute in some way and love the community of interdependence and teamwork that the marches help foster. I've heard from people who've received them and they're so happy.”

The snowflake maker in action (with a little "help" from a furry friend...)

Of course, like many kind people, Julie gives back in other ways, too.  She volunteers at a local high school theater sewing costumes, an activity that she reports is “chaotic, but so much fun”.  Julie, as a theater nerd who was involved in many high school productions, I say thank you on behalf of the kids that you (and all of the other amazing seamstresses) have costumed.  😊

Julie summed up this kind snowflake effort by saying, “I think everyone has talents and the ability to use those to make others feel better, so I just encourage everyone to look for what they can do to contribute to the common good.”  You got that right, Julie!  We all have talents we can share.  Oh sure, maybe they are not as crafty and skilled as your ability to crochet, but we all have SOMETHING we can share with others.  And if we all did, well, just imagine the kindness that would snow down on the world!

* Here is a link to the story of the kind woman who made me an amazing hat last year:  Knit Hat Kindness

Secret Shoveling Kindness

Recently in the piece called “Neighborly Kindness” I mentioned that some neighbors were shoveling sidewalks that were not in front of their house.  They were just randomly, secretly, KINDLY shoveling for people!!  Not asking for payment, not even knocking on the door and announcing their good deed, JUST SHOVELING. 

And this was no LIGHT SNOW they were shoveling either!  It was deep (around 3 feet total) and it was heavy!  So these neighbors were, in my humble opinion, going well above and beyond being “neighborly”.  They definitely crossed into the KINDNESS ACTIVIST category!

One neighbor whose walk they shoveled, Kia, figured out who was doing it.  I asked her to reveal the secret shovelers’ identifies to me, and she did.  Turns out it was a family that lives next door to her.  I walked down and saw them in action and asked if I could take their photo. 

Not only did they SHOVEL, they also SMILED!  They were having a blast.

THIS IS THE AMAZING SECRET SHOVELING FAMILY!!  Aren’t they fantastic??

The problem is, they speak Spanish, and I do not.  Of course, I know “gracias” so I did convey that to them.  But I wish I was fluent so I could tell them how awesomely kind their actions were.

You know the old saying, “A picture is worth a thousand words”??  I hope that is true, because I just framed a 5 x 7 print of the photo above to give to them.  I will walk down to their house to deliver it, plus their KINDNESS ACTIVIST buttons.  Hopefully a SMILE is worth a few words, too, because I imagine smiles will be exchanged.

There was a LOT of snow...

Kindness knows no linguistic boundaries. 

Tell me about kindness you have seen!  Send me an email at kindnessactivist@gmail.com .

Here is how deep it was in our yard (this is before it stopped snowing...).  That family shoveled a TON of snow!

Neighborly Kindness

Our neighborhood has a listserve.  And a Facebook group.  AND a second Facebook group!  You would think, given all of those online resources, that we must live in a super close-knit, well connected community, maybe one with a fancy schmancy Home Owner’s Association (HOA) or even a big old fence around the whole area.  Or you might imagine that the neighbors all know one another, play Yahtzee together on Friday nights, and invite one another over for dinner.

But those ideas about our neighborhood would be wrong.  Because even though I belong to 3 different electronic groups whose memberships are made up of my neighbors, the truth is that I do not know many of them.  Oh sure, I know a few by name, and I know some enough to smile and say “hi” if they walk by while we are working the garden.  But we are not the type of community where we all really KNOW one another.

So all of that is to explain THIS:  a neighbor named Kia has been kind TWICE to us lately, and I have never even MET HER.  J  Isn’t that fabulous??

The first time she offered her kindness was in October.  I had a grand Halloween costume idea but lacked the necessary materials to make it, namely, I needed a BIG PIECE OF CARDBOARD.  For a couple of years I wanted to dress up as bacon (me) and a big egg (David), and this year we finally had the time to make the costumes!  Only, we had no big sheet of cardboard…

So I posted on our neighborhood Facebook group asking if anyone perhaps had a big box they could give us, like from a flat screen tv or a refrigerator.  Luckily for me, someone I didn’t even know replied that she indeed had a box and we were welcome to it!  She said they had just bought a new crib and if the box was big enough for what we needed we could have it!  She gave us the address for pick up and when we realized it was only, like, seven doors down from us we walked down to pick it up.

Yup, we had never met the neighbors seven doors down.  And even after we picked up the perfect box, we STILL didn’t meet Kia!  Her husband opened the door and gave us the box, but Kia was inside feeding the kids.  (The box worked perfectly!  It was just what we needed and David’s sunny side up egg was lovely!  It was the perfect complement to my bacon.)

Hey!  It is BACON and EGGS!!  (Egg made out of a cardboard box from a baby crib!)

Wait a minute, who is that?  Could it be - EGGS and BACON??? 

Fast forward to January when we got hit with a big blizzard.  We had, like, three feet of snow and we own one (old and bent up) shovel.  Let’s just say, we had our work cut out for us…  And Kia posted a super sweet message to the neighborhood Facebook group.  She said, “Hey neighbors, someone came by and shoveled not only my driveway, but several of my neighbors as well.  We’re new to the neighborhood so I’m not sure if it’s something the county does or a neighborhood good Samaritan.  I’d love to know who it was so we can thank them.  Anyone know?” 

Proof that the snow was DEEP - this is a row of rental bikes in our neighborhood.

I replied with a comment telling her it was NOT the county J and that sooomeone must have been very sweet to her!!  Later I sent her a private message asking her to share the identity of the mystery shoveler if she found out who it was so I could recognize them in this blog.

Well, not only did she tell me who did it (they will be recognized in a future kindness entry here), she offered to loan us her family’s ELECTRIC POWER SNOW SHOVEL!!  Yes, she didn’t even KNOW US and she was going to trust their fancy new tool to us!

Well, she didn’t’ have to offer twice – off we went to borrow it!  But wouldn’t you know it, when we knocked on the door, AGAIN WE DID NOT GET TO MEET KIA, the sweet person who offered us the shovel in the first place!  She was feeding the baby, but her nice husband was happy to loan us the shovel.

Isn't this cool??  Because it was so deep, we had to do layer by layer with the Power Shovel, but it worked! 

And though I must confess that the snow was a wee bit too deep for the electric shovel to be 100% effective, it sure was FUN to use!  More often than not I got snow thrown back on top of my head, but it was a sunny afternoon and the impromptu snow shower was fun!!  It made shoveling silly and a bit easier.  (And that electric shovel would be perfect if you had only a couple of inches to scoop instead of a couple of feet!)

I am sure this goes without saying, but after a few hours when we had shoveled all we could shovel and went to return the fancy electric shovel, you guessed it, no Kia… J 

We survived the Blizzard of 2016 :)

So this story proves that even if you do not officially KNOW someone, if you have NEVER EVEN MET THEM, you can still be super kind to them!!  You can make someone very happy even without ever having met them.

Thanks Kia – you are a Kindness Activist.  I will walk down to your house this week to deliver your Kindness button – wonder if I will officially finally meet you????!  J

I found this photo of Kia on her Facebook page.  I am putting it here so next time I see her walk by I will recognize her!  :)

Do you know a Kindness Activist?  Or maybe, like Kia, you don't even KNOW them, but they have been kind to you?  Tell me about them!  Send me details at:  kindnessactivist@gmail.com .  Let's share stories of kindness and make the world a more kind place! 

Volunteered (Not Creepy Creep) Kindness

Matthew McGee is a performer in Washington DC.  I think he is funny, I thought that even before I met him.  That is because EVERY TIME my partner David would have some cool thing up on Facebook and I would say, “Who posted that?” and David would say “Matthew McGee” I would say, quite genuinely, “Do I know him?.  EVERY.  TIME.  I could never remember who he was!!! 

So when we were in the audience for the same show as he and his wife one night, David introduced us.  I laughed out loud.  I couldn’t help it!  And I explained how he had always been this mystery person to me, the guy who I couldn’t remember for the life of me!!  Now I am his FB friend, too, and when he posts stuff my brain goes, “Oh!  That is Matthew, the guy you never know who he is!”.  J  So that’s my mental connection to him.  Bizarre.

Preseeeeenting - Matthew in the snow!

Before Washington DC got socked with the blizzard, I saw a post on Matthew’s wall that inspired me.  He wrote:  “If anyone in Takoma Park or Silver Spring needs anything this weekend let me know. Don't want anyone stranded anywhere without power or other essentials. I care about you people and want you safe and protected, so if you need a place to stay you are welcome here. For those who might live farther out...you're dead to me.  J/K -  I like you too, but I can only go so far. Find some other friends, dangit! I can't save everyone!”

This made me smile and I contacted him right away to ask if I could share his kindness for this project.  He agreed, so I sent him a list of questions and asked if he could answer them for me.

Well, instead of answering about THAT act of kindness, opening up his house to anyone in need, he sent me a whole OTHER act of kindness that is also marvelous!!  Here is what he wrote:

“This morning I chose to get out of bed and see what could be done about the snow around my neighborhood. Now, I could have said, “I had that opportunity this morning to do such and such” but an opportunity is generally something you have to wait for, a door that opens that then you can act upon. While many opportunities for service come in this form, sometimes you can make the active choice to do something now. Which is what I did.

I knew it had snowed for two days, I knew neighbors were probably needing sidewalks and driveways shoveled, and I knew I was an able-bodied individual who could help. So I got up, kissed my wife, grabbed a shovel, and went looking.

I first started out by helping a neighbor from my complex shovel her car out of the parking lot. Then another couple neighbors came out to work on their cars, so I helped them too. When I felt like they were pretty free of their snow cave I went around the corner and found many people out and about on the street. Kids sledding down the roads, parents visiting with each other, and some shoveling.

This photo is not from Matthew's story, but I wanted you to get a sense of what he meant when he talked about shoveling out cars.  This is a police cruiser in our neighborhood.  Every car in the area had at least this much snow on and around it.  Digging them out was DIFFICULT.

In summation, I shoveled the porch and sidewalk of an older woman a neighbor lady told me about when I tried to help her, then went back to help that neighbor lady with shoveling her car out of the mound that had cocooned her car, and finished with another driveway of a young mother who lived right next to where the car was parked. The mother didn’t ask (none of them did, to be honest), in fact she commented on how nice it was that I was helping her neighbor with her car, and while she was talking to some of the other neighbors a couple houses down, I went ahead and started working on her driveway.

Acts of kindness don’t require an invitation. If you see a need, do it. Don’t be a creepy creep about it, but step in and help rather than wait to be asked, because people sometimes tend to be very prideful and therefore don’t ask for help (I use sometimes graciously here, because let’s be honest, people are prideful most of the time). The mother came back and was so grateful for the help. I found out her husband had a back injury and couldn’t do it himself so she was coming out to do it all by herself (with her little daughter). Now, granted, I’m sure she is fully capable of doing it herself, but now she can spend her morning with her kids and visiting with neighbors, rather than breaking her back and joining her husband on the giant massage chair that they hopefully own. The lady with the car was very grateful for my help too, not only for her but for her neighbors as well. Her husband and kids came out earlier and we were introduced.

It was great getting to know some of the people who live right around the corner from me that I haven’t met in the two years I’ve lived in the neighborhood. How selfish of me, I know. But now I know them. And they invited my wife and I over to their place for a visit sometime. It was great helping people in my community. To ease their burdens. To make them smile. To even learn their name. People may be less inclined to ask for help, but they are almost always glad when it comes.

Serving others makes others want to serve you back, in some way that they can. If we developed these types of relationships with our neighbors more often, think of how much easier and happier our lives would be. So now that I know some of my neighbors, I plan to continue to foster that relationship of kindness and service in the days to come. How will you turn your neighborhood into a community of kindness, service, and helping hands?”

 

Marvelous photo of Matthew in the blizzard.

Isn’t this a fabulous example of a KINDNESS ACTIVIST??  I think his point about not waiting to be ASKED, but just rolling up your sleeves and helping someone out, is so perfect.  He is right, so many of us are too proud or embarrassed to ask for help.  But when it is offered with a loving heart, we are very grateful to receive it.

Thanks for being such a great guy Matthew.  I promise I will remember you (and your kindness).  You will get your kindness activist button soon.

Are you a kindness activist??  Do you know one???  Tell me about it at: kindnessactivist@gmail.com .  And check out the Kindness Activist Facebook page, give it a “like”!

P.S.  Matthew's original kindness that I contacted him about, opening up his house if anyone was stranded near him, caused a ripple effect.  He inspired me to open up OUR house.  And I am guessing that me doing that may have caused other homes to be open to people who needed shelter.  Kindness is like that - it ripples.  :)

Sandbox Kindness

So yeah, the DC metro area is getting slammed with snow.  It is, in my humble opinion, fabulous!  And it really does bring out the best in some people!!

Local hardware and grocery stores (and liquor stores!) have been super busy the last few days with people preparing to “hunker down” and ride out the blizzard. 

Longest line ever at a local Trader Joe's 2 days before the storm

Lots of things were sold out – bananas (??), milk, bread, eggs…  And apparently, SALT.  Not salt for eating, but ice melt salt for steps and sidewalks.  So when I saw this Facebook post in a neighborhood group yesterday, it made me smile:

       “Since there is no more ice melt to be had, we are opening up our full sandbox!   
        Anyone who would like to come by with a bucket and fill up, you are welcome to do so 
        now (address redacted for this blog J ). Come up the driveway to the backyard,
        sandbox is next to deck and covered. Just put cover back please.”

Talk about sweet neighbors!!!  And, like so many gestures of kindness, it was not DIFFICULT, not EXPENSIVE, just KIND!!

When I finished work for the day we set off to meet these neighbors and ask them about their kindness.  We walked half a mile in the snow (which was really fun!) and found their house.  I knocked on the door and was greeted by Harold who explained that the sand box was in the back and we were free to take as much as we needed!  Other neighbors had stopped by before us to avail themselves of this sweet gesture. 

Harold and Janet, the sandbox owners, didn’t want their photo taken, but David didn’t mind if I snapped a couple photos of him while he unburied the sandbox and put some sand in our beach bucket.   On our hike back home we passed some other walkers and David, beach bucket in hand, said we were looking for the shore.  Like many of his jokes, the recipients didn’t get it…  Oh well, I thought it was funny!

Photo is a bit blurry, but it was getting dark and cold out!!  David prepares to put some sand in his purple bucket.

Such a kind gesture - to share sand!

KEEP UP THE KINDNESS, folks.  It really does make the world a happier, more livable place.  If you see, receive, or do an act of kindness, please tell me about it so I can dub you a KINDNESS ACTIVIST and you can proudly sport your “kindness activist” button!  Email me at:  kindnessactivist@gmail.com

Me when we got back from our walk - the roads were EMPTY (which is unusual in this neighborhood)

 

Snowplow Kindness

HAVE YOU HEARD?  DC is getting hit with a blizzard of “historic proportions”!!  It’s so exciting!!  I was stuck indoors all day, but as soon as I could I pulled out the old long underwear, grabbed my ski mittens, and strapped on my brand new boots to take off into the snow!!!  I really wanted to go for a walk in the snow, plus I had seen a Facebook post earlier in the day about a wonderful kindness someone was offering!

Here are my new boots :)

But it turned out that on the way to participate in the intended kindness, we happened on ANOTHER KINDNESS!    It took us quite a while to track him down, but eventually we caught up to the gentleman we were calling SNOWPLOW MAN!!

He paused long enough to talk to me and boy, was he nice.  Turns out his name is Tim Muzik and his lives in our neighborhood (about a half mile away).  He was using his little ATV(all terrain vehicle) to remove snow from South Arlington sidewalks.  Yes, I said sidewalkS, plural.  Because he wasn’t only cleaning HIS sidewalk, he was driving around the whole neighborhood and plowing, including the sidewalks around the local park!!  Aren’t the neighbors on his street LUCKY???

I asked him about it and he explained that basically, it is just as FUN as it is HELPFUL.  He likes to keep the sidewalks clean for the neighbors because, as he put it, the area is so “walkable”.  I agree!!  He said he would be making several passes around the neighborhood during this blizzard because so much snow is falling.  I asked about having enough gas to do repeated plowings and he said he got all of the gas ready yesterday.  Way to prep, Tim!!

SNOWPLOW MAN IN ACTION!  (Well, he paused to talk - he was doing the sidewalks in the park)

He also said he really likes doing this, because this is basically the only time he can drive his vehicle around in our city!  J  I say that helping others out like he is doing is wonderful, and I am glad he can have some fun while he is doing it!  (Selfishly, I just wish he lived on our street…)

Maybe bad weather brings out the kindness in some people.  It sure does in SNOWPLOW MAN.  You, Tim, are a kindness activist!  Thank you.

More about the other kindness we received in another post soon.  For now – stay warm.  And if you see, do, or receive a kindness PLEASE tell me about it!  You don’t have to write much, just shoot me a quick email at kindnessactivist@gmail.com .  Because kindness shared inspires kindness. 

P.S. – after we came back from our walk (and had a snowball fight with the neighbors…) we shoveled our sidewalk.  I reckon there are between 4 – 5 inches of snow out there so far!!

This is me, standing in the middle of our normally VERY busy intersection at 6:30 pm on a Friday night - rush hour!