Vegan Food, Flowers, and More

One thing that I find so admirable in people is the ability to be vulnerable.  It is not easy opening up, showing your “less than perfect” side.  Especially these days. It seems like everyone has filters on their Instagram photos and, if you believe people’s Facebook statuses, the whole world has happy marriages and perfectly adjusted children.

That’s why, when someone is willing to open up and be vulnerable, I take time to embrace it. 

One underused part of the Little Yellow Free Pantry is a special request box.  There are instructions on it in English and Spanish that say if you have a special food need, write your name, phone number, and what you need on a little card and leave it.  There is a pen in the box, too (though it often finds its way home with visitors and has to be replaced).

I check that little box religiously but rarely find any notes in it.  But Monday I did!  I opened it to find a card, folded in half, that said:

GUS (phone number)

Vegan.

Thank you!

(big heart drawing)

You can bet it wasn’t long after I found it that I gave Gus a call!  He was surprised that someone was actually getting in touch with him.  In fact, he was sort of speechless.  I explained that I found his note and just needed his shopping list.  He stammered, unsure of what to do.

So, we talked a bit.  I asked if he lived in the area.  Nope, he told me, he just happened to drive by the pantry when he was making some deliveries.  He explained that times are tough right now – he is between jobs.  He was almost out of gas when he noticed the pantry and stopped.  He said he is fasting for Lenten.  He is eating a vegan diet for the month and eating fish on Fridays.  I commended his efforts and again asked for a shopping list.  But he could only sputter out a couple of items.  I think that is when I told him how much I respected his vulnerability.  “You know, not many people are brave enough to put a note in that box,” I told him.  “And I am really glad you did.  I love when people are honest and up-front about what they need.  That’s what this whole project is here for.”  He confessed that it hadn’t been easy to write the note.  He said he stood squarely in front of the pantry as he wrote it, so that no one passing by could see him. 

After we talked a while more, I said, “Listen, Gus.  You need some TIME.  Let’s hang up.  You think about what you want!  Text you list back to me at this number, and I will shop for it!”.  The silence made it feel like he was pinching himself to see if this was really happening.  I asked if he had enough gas to come to pick the groceries up, and volunteered to deliver them if he didn’t. 

A few hours later his very carefully crafted shopping list popped in.  He is using an app to plan his meals, so the items he was requesting were very specific:

            Half an avocado

            A 1 inch piece of ginger root

            Half a bunch of radish

            1/8 a cup of pine nuts

And the like.  Well, Gus, you were brave, you were vulnerable, you deserve much more than HALF AN AVOCADO!  So, I loaded up 2 heavy bags of items that I had in pantry storage and we headed out to buy the rest (and more healthy things that were not on his list but he deserved).

Let me tell you, finding Nutritional Yeast Flakes was not easy!  But the 2^nd store had them, so we were good to go!  We drove over to Gus’ place and met him.  What.  A.  Cool.  Guy!  David and I both got a great feel from him.  He was thankful and kind.  He assured us if there was anything he didn’t need he would share it with others.  I sure am glad he stopped to write a note – I am glad we got to meet him!

Nutritional Yeast Flakes, baby!!

Kindness Activist funds spent:  $127.85

A neighbor recently posted in a Facebook group that she was looking for glow sticks for a “glow party” for a first grade classroom.  Well, she had me at GLOW STICKs, and I was ALL IN AT GLOW PARTY!!!  I mean, what even IS a glow party??  I wasn’t sure, but I knew I wanted to be invited!!

I told her I would hook them up then ran out shopping.  I panicked a bit when I couldn’t find glow sticks, but a clerk helped me (first she took me to the GLUE STICKS and I had to explain, no GLOW, not GLUE…).  I stocked up on all of the glow stuff I could find in 2 stores (blow necklaces, glow sticks, glow balls, glow wands – anything that had “glow” in the title went in my cart!) and dropped them off at the requestor’s home.

She contacted me after the glow party and told me that it went really well.  She said, “We really appreciate your going out and buying the glow in the dark things!  The kids voted on a “glow in the dark blanket party”, which is not something either of us teachers had ever heard of!  And of course, we were going to do the party the next day.  The lead teacher is nicer than I am, I would have either limited theme choices to stuff we could do overnight or postponed the party until Monday.  You really “saved our bacon”. “

 

1st grade GLOW PARTY!

The lead teacher sent this note to the students’ parents:  “The Glow in the Dark – Compliment Party.  Mrs. A and I were able to get some glow in the dark necklaces, bracelets, and balls.  Mrs. A. found an organization that provided our class with numerous items that the class enjoyed in the effort to celebrate their dedication to learning and kindness.  We even played a glow in the dark ball game.  How fun!  The students used their flashlights and glow sticks to read today.  Some used their blankets as tents while others held them.  The classroom looked very creative.”

Glad to do it, first graders!  Everyone should get to celebrate with a glow party (and teachers in the US should not have to spend money out of their pockets to make special events like that happen).

Kindness Activist funds spent:  $47.22

Another neighbor recently asked for an armoire in a group. 

She didn’t get the armoire, but she got a whollllle lot more.

She was looking for the armoire to solve a vexing problem, one that was delicate and probably a bit difficult to admit in public.  But it turned out when she admitted it, when she was willing to be VULNERABLE, people came out of the woodwork not only with suggestions and ideas, but with, “Us, too!  We have the same issue!!”.  All of the sudden she was not alone, plus she had creative ideas on how to try and solve the problem.

I did not have ideas to help her, but I DID have Kindness Activist funds, and time to go get her a special treat.  I left this on her doorstep:

Sometimes when you are down and having a hard day, you just need some flowers.  And chocolate.  And maybe wine.  They won’t make the difficulty go away, but they WILL remind you that there are many good things in life.

Kindness Activist funds spent:  $27.41

And finally for this report, my partner David was approached at the gas station by a woman who asked for $10 to help fill her tank.  She had an old truck, which was probably a gas guzzler.  At first David said no.  But as he filled up his own tank, he had a change of heart.  Gas is really expensive right now, and people who were already living paycheck to paycheck are obviously getting hit the hardest.

He went up to the woman and asked if she needed the gas to get to work.  She said yes, she is a security guard (her logoed shirt confirmed that).  He said he would be happy to put $10 in her tank, and proceeded to do so.

When he pulled out, the woman stayed at the pump.  She was asking others to pitch in $10, too.  I hope she got enough to fill that truck up.  And I hope she made it to work on time. 

This was such a good example to me of how when everyone pitches in, things can get done.

Kindness Activist funds spent:  $10.00

"Check Out" This Kindness

A local grocery store, Harris Teeter, mails out coupons to bring people into the store.  They recently sent one that said if you spent $100, you would get $20 off.  So, instead of using it on our groceries, we decided to use it on an unsuspecting stranger’s groceries!!

Like with all Kindness Activist acts, I was psyched.  I really love spreading kindness around!  But one thing I always wish is that I could bring some of YOU along so that you could experience the joy, too.  But since it would be logistically difficult to bring a bunch of people along, we did what we hoped would be the next best thing and streamed it via Facebook live 😊 .  

Anyway, a super sweet looking young woman walked into the self-check area just as we were ready to start.  I approached and asked if it would be alright if we paid for her groceries.  She was a bit startled, but said OF COURSE!

And we started ringing!  She had a cartful, and our limit was $100.  The cashier really got into it, too.  She was loving it!  The subtotal kept creeping up as we rang more and more of the items.  But guess what???  When everything had been rung, we need about $3 dollars more!!!  Hahaha.  I encouraged her to go get candy – no didn’t need candy.  How about a greeting card for your mom?  Nope.  David suggested 2 apples.  No…  Then she thought of something and rushed to get it.  It was a little healthy shot drink – I am not sure what they are called.

Ringing groceries for a sweet stranger

But after we rang that, you will not BELIEVE the total…

LOOK HOW CLOSE WE GOT TO $100!!

YES!  $100.51!!!  We couldn’t have gotten it that close to exactly $100 if we tried!!

The woman was so appreciative.  She was taking photos to show her mom 😊 .  And after we paid, she took out $50 in cash and tried to give it to us to support Kindness Activist.  But in THIS case, a donation didn’t seem right.  So, I asked her to please share that by doing something kind for someone else.

What a fun act!  We have another coupon for the same store that is for the second half of March.  I wouldn’t be surprised if we do this one again!  Who knows who will be in line next time…

(You can see the video of the live feed here: "Check Out" This Kindness

Kindness Activist money spent - $80.76 (after the coupon and with 5 plastic bags)

 

 

 

Hug From A Stranger (By Way of Dried Fruit)

Do you know what this is?

I bet you guessed a plate of dried fruit.

And while you would be RIGHT, you would also be WRONG.

Because what it actually is, is a hug from a stranger.

David was outside working in the yard on Saturday when two people walked up.  They introduced themselves and chatted with him.  They told him they enjoy driving by our house very much.  They like the signs I hang, and the election project inspired them.  I could hear voices out there so peeked out the window, but was in the middle of doing something and did not go out.  But I WISH I had.

Because these people, these complete strangers, gifted us with this because display of dried fruit and an intricate, beautiful wooden bowl!!  They took time out of their lives to stop by, talk, and deliver an amazing present to perfect strangers!  Isn’t that amazing??

Luckily, they signed their name and address on the card so we know who to thank.  And I have found them on Facebook and friended them.   But I was just so honored and excited to be the recipient of this kindness. 

These people didn’t know what a hard couple of years we have had.  They didn’t know the anniversary of my dad’s death is creeping on the calendar. They didn’t know my sister and I have had to indefinitely postpone our trip to get our sister’s ashes made into artwork.  They likely do not know that my WHOLE JAM is spreading kindness, most often to strangers.  They didn’t KNOW.

But they took time to appreciate what they saw.  To be thankful.  And to interact.

And for that, I am ever so grateful.

Thank you for the hug, strangers.  It meant more than you can understand.

 

The Kindness Yard Sale Funds Are SPREADING!

It’s time for a KINDNESS YARD SALE UPDATE!!  Because the sale was soooo successful, there’s a ton of kindness to spread this year, and it is exciting!  So, let’s take a peek at the recent kindness that has gone down:

A woman named Tracey in my local Buy Nothing group posted that she was looking for white shoes to wear to nursing school.  Wait – what??  You can’t wear USED SHOES when you are learning to be a NURSE!  I pictured her standing on her feet all day, walking the hospital hallways, learning how to chart and take blood pressure, etc.  No, used shoes would not do in that situation.  She needed BRAND NEW ONES – shoes with good support and in perfect condition!

I contacted her and asked if it would be ok to get her some, and she was thrilled.  She looked online and found just the ones she liked.  I ordered, we waited, and VOILA – new white shoes!!!!

Nurse-to-be rocking her new white COMFY shoes!

Tracey - I hope nursing school goes great.  I know from experience that nurses are some of the most IMPORTANT people in the healthcare industry.  I bet you will be an awesome one!

(Spend on the nursing shoes: $64.26)

A neighbor sent me a message recently asking if I take nominations for people to receive kindness.  Hmmm.  The woman contacting me had both donated and shopped at the yard sale, so I didn’t have to think long before saying, “Well, sure!  What do you have?  I would love to consider it!”.  She explained that she had a friend who was feeling isolated during Covid.  My neighbor wished she lived closer to her friend so that they could visit in person, but wondered if perhaps a little kindness from a stranger would bring some joy.  That sounded like a perfect fit for a Kindness Activist act, so I started online shopping! 

Before long I landed on the website Uncommon Goods.  Boy oh boy, if you ever want to get someone an interesting, unique gift, check it out!  I asked my neighbor a couple of questions about her friend, then narrowed my search down to a few items.  My favorite was this bracelet, so I was glad it was my neighbor’s favorite, too! 

Here is the description of it from the website:“Shooting stars. Birthday candles. Found pennies. The perfect moment to make a wish doesn't have to rely on chance. Hidden within this bracelet's clasp is a secret compartment to stash your personal wish - whether it's a daily intention, a meaningful reminder, or exactly what you've been wishing for. Simply write your wish on a tiny bit of paper (a set of just-the-right-sized sheets is included), roll it up, and tuck it into the opening. Wear it as a daily reminder to keep at it and stay focused on your goal—because putting what you want out there is the first step in making your wishes come true. “

Just a few clicks, a little note to insert with the bracelet, and then we waited!! 

I was so excited the day my neighbor messaged me and said, “IT ARRIVED!  And she is trying to figure out who it is from!!”.  The mystery of it all made me giggle.  Eventually my friend revealed the back-story, and the bracelet recipient might even be reading this now!  If so, hope you liked your special gift.  I hope you wear it in good heath and tuck a special wish or dream in the secret compartment.  And I hope when Covid is over and you come to visit Arlington, I get to meet you!

(Spend on the bracelet - $54.64)

Website: https://www.uncommongoods.com/

You may remember a story I wrote about a young man I met at the Kindness Yard Sale and really took a liking to.  His name is Langston, and he is in the ASL (American Sign Language) club at his school.  I am an ASL interpreter, so I encouraged him to keep studying and come work with me someday!  The field needs more male interpreters and interpreters of color.

He and his mom bought several things at the sale.  One thing he picked out for himself was a Fit Bit.  He walked by a couple of weeks after the sale his dad and they stopped to chat.  I was thrilled to hear that Langston is using that Fit Bit every day!  His record is over 23,000 steps in one day!

Anyway, to continue to encourage him to study ASL, I used Kindness funds to buy him a t-shirt made by a Deaf woman.  It says “equal” in ASL.  It can also mean “equality”.  I thought it was really fitting with the Black Lives Matter movement happening now.  I wore my ASL shirt when we delivered Langston’s so we could take a photo together.  On mine, the “O” in the word “vote” is the sign for vote!  Isn’t it cool? 

EQUALITY!

(Spend on t-shirt - $24.45)

Website:  https://shop.spreadshirt.com/erryb/?fbclid=IwAR1MpPD49Nb1j2HEZg6-z9HqChi515eKFXe9PtZpUYO2tX_kCyGwkuPN5ZU

A woman in town is taking care of her mother who has memory issues.  That duo has such a soft spot in my heart - watching their relationship is beautiful.  When there was a little wicker desk/vanity left over after the Kindness Yard Sale, I hoped her mom could use it!  She likes to write cards and letters to mail to people.   Sure enough, it was a size and style that would fit in their home, so we put it in the back of our car and brought it to them.

But you can’t have your own DESK without a little PLANT on it…  So, we got a little potted mini rose bush.  And if you are going to have a desk, you need PAPER…  Got some memo pads.  And if you are going to write cards, you need CARDS!  Grabbed some cards. 

Desk with supplies - all ready for the new owner and lots of letter writing

It was very fun to drop everything off at the house.  Because of Covid we socially distanced and set it up in the front yard (they brought it in later that evening).  But we talked a while and the mom smiled.  She was very curious about the tiny roses.  And as we pulled away I saw her move the desk a bit so she could sit at a bench in the yard and “work at the desk”.  Made my heart very happy.

(Spend on desk supplies - $14.52)

And finally for this update – a MYSTERY GIFT!!!  I read somewhere that someone bought something for a stranger off of their Amazon Wish List.  I do not use an Amazon Wish List, so I wasn’t sure how that would work, but I called my big sister on video, shared my screen, and off we went!!  It was FUN!

We decided a BABY GIFT would be good, so we went to the Baby Registry.  Then I made up a name (a common-ish sounding name) and typed it in – VOILA!  There were about a dozen women with the name I entered who were having or had had babies and had wish lists!!!  We chose a woman whose baby is due soon (September 3^rd) who lives in Kentucky.  We could tell from looking at her wish list that she is having a boy, and it looked like it was probably her first baby. 

Nothing on her list had been purchased so we had lots to choose from!  We debated which route to go – diapers would be PRACTICAL but also maybe something local friends and neighbors would give her.  In the “go big or go home” department – we decided on the most expensive item on her registry – a video baby monitor!!  It looked really nice and I bet she will get a ton of use out of it.   And it is also something that would be hard to buy out of a pocket when you are also dealing with getting all of the basics.  We also bought a little board book about animals. 

New baby monitor for a brand new baby

We included a note that the money used to buy these gifts was raised at the Kindness Yard Sale in Arlington, VA and we had chosen her at random on Amazon.  The gifts were delivered this Saturday!  I wish I could have seen her face when she got them.  She doesn’t have my name or contact info, but who knows, maybe she will Google “Kindness Activist” and end up reading this!

(Spend on baby gifts - $179.83)

That's the 2020 update so far.  More Kindness Yard Sale news as it happens!! 

Cot of Kindness

I asked for a cot.  But I received KINDNESS.

My sister has glioblastoma GBM), brain cancer.  She was diagnosed in July 2018, and after brain surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy it recently recurred, crossing over to the other side of her brain.  It is now untreatable.

So, while the past 17 months have been packed with trips, long talks, literally checking things off her bucket list, telling stories, laughter, and tears – her remaining time will be spent in a hospice house, surrounded by loved ones, tenderness, and many visitors.  She moved into the hospice house on Sunday and 5 family members have set a rotating schedule to spend the night with her so that she never has to be alone (her biggest fear right now).

The hospice house has a recliner in her room that folds back, but it does not seem the most comfortable way to spend an entire night.   My nephew ordered a cot to keep in the room for whoever was staying over to use, but it wasn’t arriving until TUESDAY.

So, on Monday (which was my scheduled night to spend over), I posted this message in the “Buy Nothing Traveler’s Network” on Facebook:

“Is there anyone in the Omaha or Council Bluffs area that has a fold up cot or a blow up
twin bed that I could borrow? My sister was admitted to hospice today. We are going to
be spending the nights with her there, but there is not an extra bed for family members.
We have one cot that we've ordered that will arrive on Tuesday, but if I could borrow
another cot or blow up bed here then both my sister and I could spend the night with our
sick sister at the same time. We would be very appreciative.”

I had seen many wishes get fulfilled on that site, usually parents looking for things for their kids while they were traveling, so I hoped this ask might get answered.

No sooner had a posted than responses started.  People from around the country replied saying they were so sorry for what my family was going through and that they sent love and would keep us in their thoughts.

Before long, someone offered a zero-gravity chair!  Then someone offered a hammock!!  These were TOTAL STRANGERS and they were going out of their way to find a way to let me and my two sisters have a slumber party.

Then out of the blue, a Facebook message popped in.  It was from someone I had never met named Jessie.  She explained that she is a nurse in Omaha and that her sister had sent her a screen shot of my request for a cot.  She said, “TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED”.

And honestly, even before I replied to her I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  I explained about the cot.  She replied that she didn’t have a cot, but could we use a warm meal?  THIS WAS A COMPLETE STRANGER!

All the while she had posted a note on her personal Facebook page asking HER friends if they had a cot to lend!  (I found this out later when I friended her…)  And lo and behold, one of them did, and Jessie arranged it all.  She worked late and then took time to go pick up the cot and deliver it to me at the hospice house.

A complete stranger!!

And she said we can borrow it as long as we need it.

Jessie, you might not know this, but you delivered more than a cot.  You delivered a renewed belief that people are good at heart.  You delivered an understanding that if you are hurting and willing to ASK for help, it will come.  You delivered KINDNESS.  Thank you.

Wheelchair Kindness

I wrote recently about how KINDNESS helps the giver as well as the receiver. How, “when you help others, you can’t help helping yourself”.  I was thinking about it from the GIVER’S perspective – how when I go out of my way to do something kind, I feel that I somehow get a boost from it, too. 

But last week I got to experience it from the receiver’s end, and it was lovely.

I am currently in Florida, and my sisters flew in to visit us here.  I like to make funny signs to hold up at the airport and greet them when they come, so this time I made this sign:

Waiting for my sisters to arrive - photo taken by a stranger

(One sister has glioblastoma (GBM)  – a brain tumor, that was found 11 months ago after she visited us in Florida, and the other sister has a strange laughing disorder where if she laughs too hard, she passes out!  So that is what the sign referenced.)

Anyway, we were running late to get to the airport, so my partner dropped me off to run in while he parked the car.  As I was standing in the airport, several people noticed my sign.  One was a sweet older woman who asked if I would like her to take my photo with the sign.  “Sure!” I said, and she did.  I explained what it meant, and that my 2 sisters should be arriving soon.  “Would you like me to photograph them as they walk up to you??” she asked.  “Great!!” I replied.

This is something that I often do – take photos of strangers for them.  So, to have someone offer to do it for me was so nice!!

As we waited, we chatted.  She asked about my sister with GBM.  She said that she was very sorry she hadn’t thought to bring her scooter, a mobility device.  She thought my sister would have liked to have it for the visit (the idea of my sister riding around on a senior citizen’s electric scooter made me giggle inside).  Then the woman thought of another idea; she had a WHEELCHAIR at home!  She would like to give us that for while my sisters were in town!!

Now, sometimes my sister does bring a wheelchair with her on trips.  She gets tired much quicker than she used to – chemo, radiation, and a brain tumor will do that to a person.  And she walks a bit slower than she used to, too.  But we had talked before the trip and decided that her wheelchair wouldn’t really be necessary in Florida.  It wouldn’t work on the beach – pushing a chair over sand would not work.  And we probably wouldn’t visit anywhere else that a wheelchair would be necessary, and if we DID (maybe a mall), they would have one we could borrow.  So, we had consciously decided NOT to bring a wheelchair.

But this woman was SO SWEET, so KIND. To not accept her offer of a wheelchair seemed rude.  So, I talked with her about where we might pick up the chair.  Then the topic of when and how to return it came up, and she explained it was not a loan, it was a GIFT.

You see, the chair had been her late husband’s.  He died several years ago, and she had held onto his wheelchair.  This was a perfect use for it, she said, and her eyes looked so happy to have happened upon us and found such an excellent use for the chair.

So, we accepted it.  We met her stepson in a parking lot near their home and transferred the chair into our hatchback car.  It took quite a lot of wiggling luggage and people around to make it fit, but we got it in there!!  And we brought it home with us.

The gift from a stranger - a wheelchair.  So kind.

It is an old chair – the rubber around the wheels peeled off (years in the Florida sun, heat, and salt will do that).  But it was a very generous gift.  And in accepting it, I think we helped her close a chapter of her life.  The chair had found a home.  After years of storage, it would now help someone else. 

I like to think that woman’s heart is a little lighter now.  Thank you for the wheelchair, ma’am.  We are honored to accept it.

Sisters on the beach

Kindness Rocks

It has been over a month since I last wrote about kindness.  That feels like a big confession.  It is not that I have not done kind things during that time, and it for SURE is not that I have not witnessed kindness.  It is just that sometime I (and maybe all of us?) let “life” get in the way and get too carried away with our “to do” lists to really relax, take in, and appreciate all that is around us.

Then something slaps us in the face and gives us a big reminder that the hustle bustle, hurried life is not a FULFILLED one, and we take a step back (and a deep breath) and re-set.

So, let’s re-set, shall we?

Focus. Breathe.  Re-set.  

I want to share a story of incredible kindness with you. 

I wrote about our neighbor in Florida, Carol, in this blog a few months ago.*  She is a dear, sweet, funny, and KIND woman.  I haven’t gotten to spend as much time with her as I would like, as each time we come to Florida we fill our waking hours with home repair, remote work, swimming, and beach time, so simple things like “visit the neighbors” get overlooked. 

This summer I helped Carol clean out her laundry room.  She had a bee in her bonnet that it needed sorting, so we tackled it.  One of the things we found high up on a shelf was her collection of paints and brushes.  I didn’t know she liked to paint, so we talked about it some as we cleaned.  I told her about the popular new hobby of ROCK PAINTING.  People in many cities are now getting smooth rocks and painting beautiful scenes on them, then hiding them for strangers to find!  Isn’t that lovely?  I had been wanting to try to paint a rock, and when I found out Carol thought it sounded fun to, I put it on my mental to do list; PAINT ROCKS WITH CAROL.

Then I got distracted.  We painted the front of the house.  We went to movies.  We rode our stand-up paddleboard…  And before you knew it, our time in Florida was up and we had to drive back to DC. 

I knew Carol was sick with lung cancer, she had been for a while.  But we come to Florida every few months, and she lives right next door, so, “We can paint rocks next time I am in town,” was the excuse I gave myself.

Then we got the news from her family that the cancer had spread.  And I had crammed my calendar so full of work and travel that I could not find a way to escape to Florida.  The whole situation made me super sad.  I really, really wanted to spend time with my friend, and damn it, I wanted to paint rocks with her!

I am a member of a Facebook group of rock painters called Volusia County Rocks.  I follow their posts and am amazed by the beautiful things they paint on rocks!  They are incredible!  So, after checking with my friend’s daughter to make sure it would be alright, I made a post to the group, asking if anyone would be willing to paint a rock for my friend and deliver it to her home. 

Very quickly, messages started coming in!  It was “rockers” saying things like, “Sure!  I would love to paint a rock for your friend” and “I would be happy to take one over to her”.  My heart melted.  I couldn’t be there to sit with Carol and paint rocks, but these rockers, strangers who I have never met, were kind enough to jump in. 

I told the family to start looking outside the front door to see if anything showed up, and before long, gorgeous rocks started arriving.  Carol’s husband would bring them in to her, and they were both so pleased!!  Carol thought they were beautiful, and her husband, well, he fixated on the rocks themselves – how big and smooth they were – and surmised that they simply had to be from another state…  😊

A sea turtle!  Perfect for Florida

What a fun, happy little rock!  With a hairband! :)

A serene sea scene

We made it to town in time to see Carol.  It has been so nice to sit with her.  She has all of the rocks lined up in her “Florida room”, where she rests in a hospital bed.  Her family and hospice are taking good care of her and keeping her comfortable.  She and I looked through the rocks together, and she held one in her hand.  It made me smile to see – and made my heart sing at the thought of the KINDNESS OF STRANGERS, willing to share their art and their love with my friend.

This marbled effect is so pretty

A MERMAID!  Isn't she beautiful?

It is well.  Simply stated, and so poignant

Love you Carol.  And thank you, rockers.  Your kindness rocks.

The collection.  Kindness in the form of rocks.  

P.S. - I am not here to preach or tell you what to do, but please learn from my mistake:  make time to do the little things you want to do NOW.  Don't put them off.  

*Here is a link to the story of CAROL’S kindness, posted earlier this year:  Coke Kindness

**If you would like to get involved in painting rocks, Google and see if your area is doing it!  Many places are, and it is awesome.

***If you, like me, believe that reading/hearing about kindness is inspiring and makes you more "alert" and receptive to see it in the world, "like" Kindness Activist (this project) on Facebook.  I post stories and photos of kindness there.  

Bonus photo - sea scene with a lighthouse!

Lunch Time Kindness

This story of kindness makes me smile so big.  It is an act of kindness I have heard about, read about, even WROTE about near the beginning of this project* (see link at the bottom of this post), but this is the first time I was (almost) around to witness it!!

Ryan and Beth were in a restaurant eating lunch.  They were working at a conference, and had taken their hour-long break to grab a bite to eat.  But before you can understand the act of kindness and how cool it was, you need to understand Ryan and Beth and how cool THEY are!  Smiley face**.

Photo of Ryan and Beth seated and smiling.  Ryan is wearing a green short sleeve t shirt and Beth is wearing a short sleeve dark green shirt.  Beth wears glasses and a silver bracelet.  They are at a table in a restaurant.***

Beth is Deaf.  She lives in Seattle.  She is a “PAP” – Professional Access Provider.  Basically, that means she provides full communication and access to someone who is both Deaf AND Blind, a person who is known as DeafBlind.  Beth does many things in her PAP role – guiding, interpreting menus, interpreting conversations, traveling with a DeafBlind person – she does a LOT.  One thing she does NOT do is HELP.  She is not a HELPER, she is just there to facilitate the independence of the DeafBlind person.  And trust me, if you met her client Ryan, you would understand that he is not looking for HELP, smiley face.

Photo of Beth seated, smiling.  She is wearing a bright orange shirt that says "St.. Lucia"

Ryan is DeafBlind****.  He also lives in Seattle and is who Beth was working with on the day that this kindness occurred.  He communicates via tactile sign language, or preferably via "pro-tactile" - which conveys not only the WORDS that are spoken, but the visual environment and the non-manual responses of those around him (like head nods).  Ryan is wicked smart.  The things you and I “cheat” and look at our cell phones to confirm (you know, like someone’s phone number, the address of where we are staying, a credit card number…) – yeah, Ryan has all of that stuff MEMORIZED.  He communicates using American Sign Language (ASL) and braille.  His cell phone syncs with a Bluetooth braille reader, which gives him access to everything you and I take in with our eyes. 

Photo of Ryan.  He is standing outdoors, wearing a black shirt and smiling.
There are green trees, grass, and a light in the background.

So, on the day this kindness occurred Ryan was working at a booth at a conference and Beth was supporting him.  They took their lunch break, and when I saw them after they ate they were both smiling from ear to ear!!!  I talked with them to ask what made them so happy, and here is what they told me:

Beth: “I was with my client, Ryan.  He and I were wondering what to have for lunch and we decided on the Mexican restaurant, Mi Casa.” 

Ryan: “We wanted chicken salad, but couldn’t find any good looking salads, so we settled on MiCasa, where we had eaten a couple of days before.  We were hungry and pressed for time.”  

Beth:  “When we were finished with lunch, Ryan asked the waiter for the check and was told that the man who had been seated at a table behind us eating and had left had ALREADY PAID FOR US!  We both thought, ‘What???’.  Ryan asked the waiter who paid – what the person looked like and what his name was.  The waiter wrote down the person’s name and gave it to us.” 

How did it make you feel when you realized he paid, I asked.

Beth:  “At first, I was kind of shocked.  Then I thought, “Man, that was totally out of the blue that he paid for us!”.  But it felt good.  It gave me shivers.  I thought, 'How generous for someone to do that!'."

Ryan:  “It was really unexpected, shocking, and nice.  It was a BIG PLUS! It was really inspirational.  I thought it was so nice of him to buy our meal!  It was a very unexpected random act of kindness.”

After they told me the story of what had happened, I could see that they really wanted to THANK this man.  Also, I wanted to make sure he knew how touched they were that he had treated them!  So, I set about FINDING him!!  We had his name from the slip of paper the waiter gave them, so I started where any amateur Private Investigator would start – FACEBOOK!! 

As luck would have it, the secret stranger has a super long (12 letters!) last name, so even though the waiter actually wrote it down wrong and skipped one letter, I FOUND THE MAN ON FB!  I could tell from the name, location, and job description that he was likely our guy!  I did a bit more detective work (part of which was walking around trying to read name tags of conference attendees, but that idea didn’t help much, grin).  But asking at the registration desk was very effective, and resulted in an email getting to the man asking him to come to Ryan’s booth.

Sure enough, about an hour later, up he walked!!!  He was very humble and a bit shy, but happily accepted Ryan and Beth’s profuse thanks.  He was also happy to receive an official KINDNESS ACTIVIST pin (which he said he would give to his daughter). 

The BEST PART of getting to meet the Kindness Activist was learning WHY he had paid for their lunch.  You might imagine it was because he saw them and wanted to “help”.  Or maybe because he is the type of person who likes to “pay it forward”.  But no – he bought them lunch, he explained, because they had helped HIM the day before!!!  He had come up to their booth (which was promoting Sprint IP Relay*****) and asked questions.  Ryan had answered them so well and explained the product he was representing so thoroughly and clearly that the man just wanted to quietly “thank them” by picking up their check!!  Isn’t that great? 

When I asked Beth why she thought he bought them lunch, she said, “I think just out of the goodness of his heart, really.”  Because the stranger paid "in secret" and because we only met him after I hunted for him, I will keep him anonymous and not call him out by name in this story.  But I am very glad we got to meet him!

I asked Ryan and Beth if that had ever happened to them before, that a stranger paid for their meal.  Remarkably, they BOTH had experienced it previously!  “This is the 2^nd time this has happened to me, but this one was even more touching,” said Beth.  “The first time it happened was when we ate out and paid for some people from church.  When someone saw we had done that, THEY paid for us!  But this time it was totally out of the blue!”  Ryan said, “This wasn’t the first time it I had experienced something like that.  I had my meal paid for another time this month, too!”.  I told him this must be his LUCKY MONTH – smile. 

Like so many acts of kindness, this one inspired the recipients.  Beth said, “I think that next time we go out to eat we need to “pay it forward” and buy someone else’s meal.  We can inspire them!”  Ryan agreed; “Yes, this inspired me to pay for someone else’s meal, too.  I would rather pay for a disabled person’s meal”, to which Beth added that she, as his Professional Access Provider, can be on the look-out for a disabled person in a restaurant while they are eating.

I have a feeling that someday soon the “Ryan and Beth team” will be secretly picking up a stranger’s tab. 

Kindness – it just keeps on spreading!!

*Link to the previous piece in Kindness Activist about paying for a stranger’s meal:  Waffle Kindness

**You may have noticed that instead of using “emoticons” in this piece, a description of the emoticon was written out.  That is because people who use braille do not have access to emoticons.

***You may have also noticed that the captions on the photos for this post are descriptions of the photos.  That is so that people who are blind/low vision and use braille or a program that reads text aloud for them (a screen reader) can visualize what is shown in the photo.

****For more information about DeafBlindness, check out this link:  AADB FAQ 

*****More information about SprintIP, the product Ryan was promoting, can be found here:  SprintIP