kindness activist

kindness activist
Showing posts with label be present. Show all posts
Showing posts with label be present. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 16, 2019

Corner Kindness


My partner David and I visited Chicago recently.  We were exploring the city, which is BIG, cold, and windy in this time of year.  One evening we were rushing back to our niece’s home, where we were staying, for dinner.  We were walking toward the L – Chicago’s version of a subway/metro system.  Because it was cold and we were running late, we were walking briskly.  I noticed an African American man, maybe my age, sitting on a corner right outside a Walgreen’s store, but we walked past.

We got about a block away when I told David that I felt bad for passing the man by.  He hadn’t asked us for anything, but he had a small cup in his hand to collect money, and it was obvious he was homeless.  So, we turned around and walked back to meet him.

Once again, as we approached, he did not ask for anything.  He sat in silence under the store awning on the cold, dark evening.  I greeted him, then said, “I do not have any money to give you.  But we will get you WHATEVER you want from this store.  What would you like???”. 

His eyes lit up.  He smiled at us.  “You will get ME something???”, he asked us incredulously.  “Yes!  Whatever you want.  What would you like?” I asked him with a smile.  It didn’t take long for him to smile back and say in a very clear voice, “GREEN GRAPES!!”. 

Now, I must say at this point, that I had been worried he would ask for alcohol.  It was a big store, and bottles of booze were displayed in the window.  I had a plan – if he asked for alcohol or cigarettes, I had planned to say I could get him anything except those items.  But he did not ask for those things.  GREEN GRAPES were all he wished for.  And just the idea of the grapes seemed to make him very happy!

“Is there anything else you need or want??” I asked.  “Maybe gloves??” David added.  Why yes, he did need some gloves, as it was cold out and he had none.  Before we popped into the store I said, “We will be right back, don’t go anywhere!” and he smiled a big smile at me and said, “I ain’t goin’ NO WHERE!!”.

In we went, afraid that Walgreens was not the right type of store to find green grapes.  But lo and behold, there they were, a small refrigerated section displayed some very nice grapes!  Ok, got those!  Then found some soft, warm black gloves.  Then grabbed a couple of hand warmers and a bottle of water.  Then, for good measure and a bit of protein, we got some trail mix for him.

We brought everything out in a bag and showed it to him.  He was so very, very happy.  “I don’t even know your name,” I realized.  “I can tell you who I am.  I – I am JEFFREY THEODORE…”.  He told us his last name, too, and his rank in the military.  Yes, it turned out that he, as so many other homeless people, was a veteran.  I thanked him for his service and he told us about places he had been deployed.  David asked if he was connected to the VA and if they assisted him, and he politely explained that, when you had been in the military as long as he had been, sometimes you felt a need to “disconnect” from that and not work with the VA.

We told him our names and then he asked if we could do him a favor.  He held out his hands to us.  His hands that probably hadn’t been washed in quite a while, the hands we had seen wipe his nose as it ran from the cold weather. 

And we held his hands.  We stood, the 3 of us, a small circle of hope on a dark, cold night.  And Jeffrey prayed.  The man who had nothing and wanted only grapes, prayed.  But he didn’t pray for housing or for food or for money.  HE PRAYED FOR US.  Not to convert us, but to thank the Lord that people stopped and had kindness in their hearts.  He wished for peace and kindness in the world. 

Tears streamed down my face.  It was all so beautiful.  We gave him grapes, he gave us the world all he had in the world.  Strong hands to hold.  A renewed belief in humanity.  And kindness.


For accounting purposes, we spent $20.37 of the money raised at the Kindness Yard Sale on this act.  It felt impossible to measure the happiness and peace that came as a result of that small amount.  THANK YOU to everyone who donated and shopped at the Kindness Yard Sale. 

$316.87 of the proceeds from the yard sale is squirreled away waiting for perfect opportunities to use.  And $229.43 has already been used for kindness but this tired Kindness Activist needs to find time to sit down and tell you the stories of where it went here. 

For now, just know this – it is worth stopping and talking.  It doesn’t matter if it is DARK.  It doesn’t matter if it is COLD.  What matters is that we connect as humans.  We give what we can, and we make the world a better place.  One green grape at a time. 

Best $20.37 I have spent in a long time.

Tuesday, June 25, 2019

Taking Attendance - Are You Present? (And More Kindness Yard Sale Accounting!!)

Remember when the teacher used to take ATTENDANCE?  Count who was THERE for the day?

I think that we (humans in general) are sometimes in ATTENDANCE, but not really PRESENT. 

Know what I mean?  I for one am guilty!  Took a long road trip this week, but how much scenery did I see (vs. how many games of Words With Friends did I play…)?  This is something I have tried to work on in my life the past decade or so – being PRESENT in moments, paying attention, getting involved, interacting, and noticing things.

In that vein, 2 days ago I posted this on a Facebook page I run called “Kindness Activist”:

“Hypothetical question: if someone handed you $50 right now, what would you do with it?   #KindnessActivist “

Only, guess what, it was NOT a hypothetical question.  It was real – a genuine query to see what people would do if I gave them $50 of the proceeds from the Kindness Activist Yard Sale.  I have had the pleasure of using some of the money, I wanted to see what others might do with it if they were given the chance to share it.

The results were confounding to me.  80 people viewed the post.  13 people “engaged” with the post (whatever that means).  And only 2 – TWO – took time to ponder what they would do with the $50 and reply.  That astounds me, because it seems so opposite of what my immediate response would be to a prompt like that!  I think if I were asked the same question, I would reply with a dozen things I would like to use $50 for 😊 . 

I thought about WHY people may not have responded.  Ideas I came up with:
  •  Too busy
  •  Uninterested
  •  $50 was not enough money to take a break in their day to consider how they would use it
  • Hypotheticals aren’t their thing
  • Too much effort to think of something
  • They deemed it a stupid post 😊
  • They thought someone else would have a better idea of what to do with the money



But 2 people DID reply.  I considered what that might mean about them:
  •       They had some downtime to think about the question
  •          They like hypotheticals
  •          They suspected it might not be hypothetical
  •          They live their lives as present, engaged, creative, and interactive people



Note:  I am NOT dissing anyone who saw the post and didn’t reply, I just really like the social experiment aspect of it and considering the ins/outs/whys of it all.

I hope the 2 respondents don’t mind if I extrapolate a bit about them here.  

Rebecca
The first to reply was Rebecca Kinder Lahan.  I have known here for many years (she was in our wedding 😊 ).  I know her to be very creative, genuine, caring, and honest.  She is a super fun mother of 3 and is so concerned about the state of education where she lives that she ran for school board and was elected.  Plus, she and her family take a terrific photo with Santa every year.  GO REBECCA!  She said that she would use the $50 to donate to RAICES to help migrant families at the border. 

Samantha
The other respondent was Samantha Marcum Blackaby.  I have not known Samantha very long – she is the niece of our Florida neighbor.  What I DO know about her is that when her Aunt Carol (our neighbor) died and we went to Kentucky for the funeral, Samantha opened up her home to us as if we were family.  She lives on a farm and she let us throw on some borrowed boots for the mud and took us city-folk on a tour of that farm that I will never forget.  I was in a CHICKEN COOP, people!!  And the next day she cooked us a breakfast like no other – there was food for days, all of it made by her (and her parents) even though they were in the middle of grieving a dear relative.  I also know she is a very supportive mother, in love with her little nephew, has gone through some super tough experiences in her life but keeps smiling, and is an amazing 3rd grade teacher in rural Kentucky.  Samantha said she would use the $50 to buy a pair of tennis shoes for a child she knows for the upcoming school year.

Now for the accounting part of this post:
·         
     Rebecca - $50 of the proceeds from the Kindness Yard Sale have been donated to RAICES in your name
·    
     Samantha - $50 of the proceeds from the Kindness Yard Sale are heading your way to invest in new shoes for your deserving student

And to the rest of us – let’s strive to live like today isn’t hypothetical.  Let’s engage, interact, create – be it in the virtual world or in the real one that surrounds us. 
Let’s BE IN ATTENDENCE and BE PRESENT. 

P.S. – we miiiight have bought some Powerball tickets to hand out…  I mean, hypothetically speaking, there could be a couple of chances for someone, maybe YOU, to turn into a millionaire come Wednesday June 26th….  If you want to be PRESENT for that, comment here.  I mean, SOMEBODY’S gotta win, right? 

P.P.S. – if you would like to follow Rebecca’s lead and donate to RAICES, here is how:  https://www.raicestexas.org/donate/