Magical Kindness Ripples

I believe in magical thinking.

I have always known that I do, and it is something I rather enjoy (most of the time).  My magical thinking manifests itself in a variety of ways and I embrace it.  I do not believe that it makes me irrational or childish (as some might say) – I think it is an extension of my creative brain.

My magical thinking has played a part in a mystery this year.  One that I feared to solve, because perhaps knowing the true answer would make the magic disappear (or maybe cause it to be “less magical” if that makes sense).

 

Here is the mystery:

 

We had another secret donor to the Little Yellow Free Pantry.

 

Boxes and bags would arrive with the same name on the Amazon slips over and over – a first initial and a last name. 

 

Of course I NOTICED it.  I mean, how could I NOT?  The mystery gifts arrived so frequently.  The boxes often contained fun, unusual items from the Pantry wish list, things that more “practical” donors might not choose.  A jar of salted nuts.  Pancake syrup.  Spices.  Chocolate chip cookie mix.  Not things that are strictly NECESSITIES, but items that make eating more enjoyable, and “level the playing field” a bit for those who are food insecure (and make their dinners much, much less boring).

 

Now, in the back of my mind, of course I was curious who was sending these donations.  There were never any NOTES on the Amazon slips, just the same initial and last name – box after box.  After a few months my curiosity got the best of me.  I worked up some courage and sent awkward messages to anyone I knew whose first initial and last name matched the Amazon slips.  I sent a neighbor this odd message, “Are these amazing donations for the Little Yellow Free Pantry that come with Amazon slips saying (first initial last name) from YOU?  I just opened another one - sunflower seeds, ramen, OLD BAY, spices, and hot sauce!!”.  I soon got this reply, “I'm sorry to say, not me. I know there are many of us with this initial and name!”.  I asked another possible contender, and after denying it was her, she said, “Aww. I wish I could claim it”.

 

And I will go ahead and confess here that in my heart of hearts, I connected this mystery donor to the other donor that I became long-distance mystery friends with – E.A. Raven.  She, like this new person, sent box after box of delightfully chosen items for the pantry.  Only, she included NOTES, which upped the ante and always made me smile.  And back then, Amazon was much more civilized and had a feature where recipients of gifts (me in these instances) could scan a QR code and write a short thank you back to the giver!!  So of course, with each E.A. Raven delivery, I would excitedly scan the QR code and send her (or was it a him???) a note back.  I didn’t know who I was writing, but I knew I was very grateful for them.

 

I didn’t find out who E.A. Raven was until after she had passed away.  Her sister Ann emailed me telling me of the death.  The email was so kind – “My sister Betty Raven loved donating items to your charity. Sadly, she passed a week ago. I wanted to inform you so that you understand why she stopped donating.”

 

The story of the strange long-distance friendship and the incredible woman’s kindness to a charity so far away became the topic of a piece in the Washington Post.  Talented journalist Theresa Vargas interviewed me and E.A. Raven’s family and shared the beautiful story of kindness.  And when the piece was published – boxes flooded in.  People from all around the country read the piece, were inspired by E.A. Raven’s kindness, and joined in the magic.

 

Just some of the MANY boxes that arrived after the first E.A. Raven story was published in
the Washington Post (December 2023)

I didn’t know it at the time, but one person who saw that Washington Post article about E.A. Raven realized that perhaps supporting the Little Yellow Free Pantry was just the thing she was looking for.  She was not a “people person”, but wanted to give back to the world.  She, like almost every person I have ever met, WANTED to be kind, but needed an outlet.  Could the Little Yellow Free Pantry and Kindness Activist fill the need??

 

Ironically, E.A. Raven had also found out about Kindness Activist through a story written by Theresa Vargas and published in the Washington Post.  The one she read was about the Santa Project – the delightful (and large) project we undertake each December.  Children write letters to Santa and mail them in a special box at our home, and Santa writes each child a letter back (there’s no AI in kindness, these are all written from the heart).  Each child also receives a gift/gifts that they requested.

 

Sweet letter writing finishing up his note to Santa (2025)

E.A. Raven had seen that story, been enthralled by our mission, and wholeheartedly jumped on board.

 

And now, it seemed, another person had seen the E.A.RAVEN story and been inspired to join in!  Talk about a kindness ripple!

 

But it was not my amateur sleuthing that solved the mystery.  You see, one day I woke up to an email that revealed the answer…  Someone had contacted Kindness Activist to ask what was the best way to make a monetary donation.  They signed the email with a single initial…  And the email address included the same last name as the mystery Amazon slips.

 

My heart leapt!!!  Could this be the person????  I replied far too quickly (and wrote far too much…):

 

“MYSTERY SOLVED!!

 

(Initial and last name) - you do not know how hard I have tried to find you!!!  

 

The donations - oh the beautiful pantry donations!!  All with the same first initial and last name.  

 

Every time I open one (or a pantry crew member opens one), the mystery:  SAME NAME.  Who is this person?  Do I know them???  Are they a neighbor?  Are they someone I have met in passing???

 

Are YOU the person of the mystery pantry donations????  If so, THANK YOU!  You have sent so many amazing donations for the pantry and helped us feed the community.  You have helped refill the storage shelves when they were getting low, and you have made so many people happy with the thoughtful choices you send.  And you have made ME happy (not that that is the goal...) by being so supportive of our mission.  THANK YOU!

 

Thank you for reaching out.  This was the BEST morning email to wake up to!! “

 

I sent that overly long email July 15^th.

 

And I waited.

 

And waited.

 

No reply.

 

Did I scare her away??  Oh, I shouldn’t have been so effusive.  But I couldn’t help it – I was so EXCITED!!

 

So, I kept waiting.

 

And 8 days later, a reply came…

 

“Yes, (first initial last name) is me.  I’m happy to have provided you a mystery.  I can’t resist them, too!

 

I should thank you for providing me with a way to help.  I’m not at all a “people person”, so volunteering seemed impossible.  But the December, 2023, W. Post article about your pantry showed me a way.  I donated via another user name through 2024 and into 2025 when I opened this new account.

 

The “shopping” is strangely soothing for me; very useful when I’m stressed.  Also, it has made me reconsider my attitudes toward food.

 

Anyway, please send me an address or your Venmo information.  Either way is fine. Thanks!”

 

THE MYSTERY WAS SOLVED!

 

Of course, there were still so many questions I wanted to ask.  But I also wanted to be respectful of her time, and didn’t want to overwhelm her.  I wrote back:

 

“I am so glad that you replied.  And am so happy to have solved the mystery!!

 

And you referenced the Washington Post article from December 2023, the one about the OTHER mystery donor, E.A. Raven, right.  Seeing that reference made me tear up.  Secretly, quietly, I called you the "new" E.A. Raven.  I didn't want to say it out loud for fear of jinxing anything, but your kindness is so reminiscent of her that I couldn't help but think of her.  Because of that article, I got to meet her sister.  She and her husband even came to visit the pantry while they were on a trip!  And the story of her sister's generosity lives on through that Post story.  

 

I get the not being a people person thing.  I get "over peopled" sometimes and just need a break.  I am glad that we can provide this outlet for you to give back.  Without people like YOU, we could not feed the village.

 

I was doing an interview last evening and I tried to explain that running a program based on donations not only helps the recipients, but it also provides an outlet for the donors.  That is something we never considered when starting Kindness Activist, and honestly, I still have to stop myself sometimes and try and reframe it for me.  I worry that I ask too much, I don't want it to seem like we are begging.  But a kind supporter recently said, "Susan, stop.  Your asks provide an avenue for people to help.".  And that is true.  I really believe that deep down, we all want to be kind.  Sometimes it is just hard to find avenues to do it.

 

Thanks for revealing yourself.  As much as I adore a good mystery, this reveal was lovely!!”.

 

She wrote, “The E.A. Raven article made me think that I could help in a way that worked for me.   Like her, I think food shouldn’t be boring, so I buy all the spices, hot sauces and peppers that I can to make these prepared foods more interesting and to allow the people who can cook to be able to be creative.

 

Now, in 2026, I buy from Amazon only for your pantry.  I try to organize my orders so that I never pay a penny in shipping (without Prime) and make Amazon deliver on as many days as possible. For example, I place a $35-plus-change order late in an evening and then have 24 hours to contemplate what other items/timing of subsequent orders would necessitate separate shipments.  My “best” order last month required shipments on 4 different days. See how much amusement your wishlist provides!”.

 

Oh how I giggled.  That last nugget of information solved another part of the mystery – why when we got donations from this lovely woman, we would get them 2 or 3 days in a row.  It was because she was sticking it to the man!!!  Working the Amazon system in her favor.  I love it!

 

In the month since this lovely story developed, this amazing human has also sent a monetary donation to Kindness Activist.  It is hard to express how thankful we are for the support. 

 

And the whole experience has been a reminder of how important KINDNESS RIPPLES are.

 

Little did E.A. Raven know, when she was resting in bed in Indiana ordering food for a pantry some 500 miles away, what a PROFOUND impact her kindness would have.  I reckon she thought she was sending just ketchup.  Or sardines.  Or cake frosting.

 

But what she was really sending was love.  And hope.  And, of course, kindness.

 

Her generosity inspired so many others.  The stories shared in the Washington Post have been read by many and resulted in the pantry receiving box after box of much needed supplies.

 

Thank you, Theresa Vargas for sharing the stories of kindness.

 

Thank you, E.A. Raven for being a beacon of love and light in what sometimes feels like a dark world.

 

And thank YOU, no longer a mystery donor.  Your kindness means the world to us.  We are grateful for your support and delighted to have solved the mystery!  Who knows, maybe someday we will end up in the same place at the same time…  Perhaps if I magical think it – it will happen!

 

Oh, and another amazing wrinkle to the kindness story.  We will be seeing E.A. Raven’s sister and brother-in-law again soon.  They are passing through our area and we will get together.

Meeting E.A. Raven's sister Ann the first time

 

I am smiling even writing this story.  It all seems so improbable. 

 

But it is true – I swear it is all true.

 

Because kindness begets kindness begets kindness.  Ripple after ripple.

 

The end (but never really the end…).

 

(Name of donor kept a secret to respect her privacy, and as one of my favorite songs says, to “Let the Mystery Be”.)

 

Washington Post article about the Santa Project:  Letters to Santa are left daily at this home. Mrs. Claus is ready. - The Washington Post

Washington Post article about E.A. Raven:  Boxes kept arriving from a mystery donor. An obituary revealed her name. - The Washington Post

Iris Dement singing “Let the Mystery Be”:  Let The Mystery Be - Iris DeMent H.Q.

Just some of the amazing donations that came in after Washington Post ran
Theresa Vargas' final column, which included the magical story of E.A. Raven and her kindness
(June 2024)

Giving Thanks

Holidays are sometimes hard for me.

I feel melancholy, not social.  Holidays make me think a lot.  I have a strong desire to make them special, yet I have an innate understanding that the specialness will not occur.  Dichotomy. 

Hence, melancholy.

But today…  Today is Thanksgiving, and we made a new friend.  A friend who represents the spirit of the holiday.  The magic of the season.

His name is Javier.

I looked out the window and saw a vehicle pulled into the last spot of the street with trunk open.  This usually indicates INCOMING.  Normally, incoming donation for the Little Yellow Food Pantry.  Sometimes, incoming warm coats for Project Warmth.  Sometimes, incoming gifts of delicious cookies.

But today, I was not sure…  Instead of bringing the bags that he pulled out of the car to the porch for donation, he was going straight to the pantry.  I reassessed – maybe this was someone who needed food, not someone giving food.

I went out to say hello and was greeted with the biggest smile.

“This is your box??” he asked, pointing to the Little Yellow Free Pantry.

 

“Yes!  Do you need food?” I asked.  The smile returned.  “NO!  No.  I do not need food.  I GIVE FOOD.”

And that was the start of an hour-long conversation, and the beginning of a new friendship.

Javier is an immigrant.  He came to the USA from Honduras, alone, 18 months ago.  And for the first 6 of those months, his food came from a Little Free Pantry, one that was located outside the Central Library in Arlington, Virginia.

As Javier told us his story, he expressed his gratitude over and over.  Gratitude for the country.  For the food.  For the people.

When he first arrived and got a job, he kept $1 of his earnings.  “One dollar,” he said, “One dollar.  In America.  What food can be gotten with one dollar?”.  The rest of the money he sent home to his wife and children, his mother, and used to pay part of the rent for a tiny space he was sharing with another immigrant.

But, like so many who make their way to this country, he was resourceful.  And strong.  And determined.

He got a bicycle.  He got more work.  He got his driver’s license.  He saved and got a car.  And he got more jobs.

He went to university back home.  He had a very good job in his country.  But now here, here in the land of the free, he wakes up at 3:30 am to begin his days.  He studies English on an app.  He reads a book.  He eats his meal.  Then he begins one of four jobs.

They are jobs that some would say are “beneath him”, but he works hard.  He saves.  He sends money home, even to support a cancer charity because his mother has breast cancer. 

And he is thriving here. 

Javier spent every dime he had made today to buy food for others, strangers.  He didn’t know where he would donate it – the pantry he used to frequent has been moved to a new location and he didn’t know where it was.  He searched online and found us – the Little Yellow Free Pantry.  So, without ever meeting us, without having benefited from our services, he came to give back.  Give back to the country and the people who are giving him a new life.

We talked for quite a while outside but it was cold, so David invited him in.  We sat at our messy kitchen table and learned more about his life.  His 3 sons.  His wife.  We got to meet his wife when he video chatted her to introduce us.  I couldn’t help but notice “mi amor” was written across the screen as her ID in his phone. 

We met his mother.  He video chatted her and interpreted for us.  I told him to please explain to her how grateful we were for his donations, and that she raised a very kind man.

Someone had donated pumpkin pies, and we had one left in the fridge.  I offered it to him even before I heard his story and he had accepted with a smile.  As we talked, he said that last year was his first Thanksgiving in his new country.  He had eaten pumpkin pie and remembered it fondly.  But this year, he had told his wife earlier today, no pumpkin pie.  And then magically – PUMPKIN PIE.  Ahhh, this explained the shine in his eyes when he took the dessert from my hands.

If you ever doubt that immigrants are what make this country amazing, please let me introduce you to Javier.  Listen to his story.  Hear how hard he works.  Feel the hope in his heart that he will be able to bring his beautiful wife and children to America.

That is thankful.

This is what deserves Thanksgiving.

 

 P.S. – a text just popped in from Javier.  It says, “This day has been incredible for my life.  I wanted to give, and in the end I received so much more by meeting you and sharing with you.  I hope to see you soon.  It was incredible – the moments by your side.”  We WILL see you soon, new friend.  Thank you for making this holiday not melancholy, but truly special.  Thank you for reminding me what true Thanksgiving is.

 

 

 

Cards of Kindness

Look, I am not naïve enough to think that a little kindness can put a dent in solving what is happening in our country right now.  It feels as if the world is on fire and no amount of kindness can put it out at this point.  Only equality and justice can begin to right these wrongs. 

But today is the first time in over a week that I have been able to focus.  It is the first time I have been able to think of action instead of anger.  Of fighting instead of crying.  So, I thought maybe a tiny dose of kindness was in order and that it might shine a little candlelight in this dark world.

This is a kind act done by a Facebook friend of mine, Katie.  I have met her a couple of times in person, she and I are both interpreters (American Sign Language/English), but mostly we know each other from social media.  A while back she messaged me and ask for my mailing address.  She said she wanted to send me a “Covid Card”.  Curious (and a lover of mail), I replied with my address.

Katie and her dog Collins ("Rent" fans will recognize that name!)

Fast forward a couple of weeks and I found THIS in my mail!!!!

Isn’t it fabulous????  It brightened my day so much!  I asked Katie if I could write about her project here, in the hopes that it might inspire someone else to do something as cool as she did.  Here’s what she told me.

“I love mailing and receiving cards and letters. It can connect you with people you’d never imagine connecting with. I have been struggling with my anxiety and mental illness since the stay at home orders began a couple months ago. I thought it would be helpful for me, and hopefully others, if I were to reach out on an individual level to the people in my life.”

Ok, yeah Katie.  I adore mail.  Like, I literally used to walk down 3 or 4 flights of stairs twice a day just to check and see if I had any mail (and I rarely did).  But that doesn’t mean I thought, “Hey, Susan, why don’t you mail out over 500 Covid cards to people….”.  Yes – you read that right.  She sent out over 500 cards!!  She said she sent 503, but with the stragglers the total will be closer to 505 or 510.  She sent them all over America (Alaska, New York, California, New Mexico, Texas, Louisiana, and all around the east coast). A few lucky people in in England, Ireland, and Australia got them, too!

A playful side of Katie at Niagara Falls

Katie likes to send cards to her friends and family for their birthdays, so this project sort of grew out of that.  She was writing out the birthday cards for March and April, then, “…I remembered how fun it is (to send cards) and how much I enjoy it. I also happened to find a BUNCH of stamps and friendship cards just that month, so I had a lot to get started on without much investment up front. It began as mainly the people I write to on their birthdays. I enjoyed it so much and people were responding SO kindly to the idea, I reached out to as many people as I could on Facebook. I’ve reconnected with a ton of people from my high school!”.

Of course I asked Katie the obvious question, WHY DID SHE DO THIS GRAND GESTURE??  “Partially for my own mental health, but more so for those around me. I thought about doing it for strangers, but the closest I got to that was making one for each person in my apartment building; I don’t know all of those people very well. But I’ve realized what I was really looking for was connections through kindness.”  That’s profound…  And, in the end, I think it is what all of us are looking for – connections through kindness. 

One thing I so admire about Katie is her honesty about mental health.  She doesn’t cloak her mental illness, she talks about it.  Her diagnoses are Bipolar 2 and ADHD.  I think openness like hers is so needed.  If more people were willing to be frank, there would be no stigma attached to mental illness.  When I asked her how she has been doing during Covid 19 she said, “To be honest, not that great. I’ve had a number of mental and physical side effects due to the increased anxiety and stress from being quarantined. My psychiatrist has had to change my meds, which did help, but I’m extremely extroverted, so I need those connections to be more present in my life.”  Isn’t it great that she found a way to make those connections without endangering her health??  US Postal Service to the rescue!!!

The newest Kindness Activist - Katie

But gestures this grand don’t come free….  So, how much DID she spend??  “Oh gosh, I’ve honestly been trying NOT to calculate it, because I’m afraid it’s a good bit, and I haven’t been able to work (the unemployment office thinks it’s paying me, but they haven’t started my payments from when I set it up in April!). But it’s $0.59 per stamp, and in averaging out the MANY sets of greeting cards I had, I maybe spent $1-$2 on each card for each person. So, that’s like almost $800. But as I mentioned, I found a bunch of cards and stamps for probably close to 100 people, so I (hopefully) spent less than that.”

“For my next project,” Katie told me, “I’m going to frame all the cards I’ve received in return and put them on my bedroom wall to remember that there are lots of people out there that I’ve had an impact on.”  Well Katie, my return card (which will include your official Kindness Activist pin and a donation for stamps) will be mailed soon!!!  Thank you for being a source of KINDNESS in the world.

And to everyone else reading, let’s take a tip from Katie.  Maybe we won’t mail 500 cards, but even 3 or 4 would brighten people’s days.  And we all need a bit of kindness these days.

Butterfly Kindness

I haven’t written here for quite a long time, and I am sorry.  There has been much sadness in my world over the last 8 months, and that sadness has consumed my time, my energy, and my creativity.  I am not going to write about that today, but I promise to do so at some point.

For now, I want to tell you a little bit about my friend Carol.  The story about her is also a sad one, but I am on a plane and was looking through old photos and found one of her that made me smile, so I wanted to share the story with you.

My friend Carol

Carol was our next-door neighbor in Ormond Beach, Florida.  She and I were quite different people; she was a country girl (Kentucky), I fancy myself a city girl (DC).  She never went down to the beach (a block and a half from our homes), I live for walks on the sand.  Politically, we were polar opposites.  We were different ages.  And yet – we CLICKED.  We had fun together and every time we went to Florida I looked forward to seeing her and laughing together.   

Carol had been sick for years – she was on oxygen (though she didn’t really keep it on as much as she was supposed to…) for bad lungs.  She had other ailments, too, like shingles and pneumonia.  But it was her lungs that failed.  They were already compromised from COPD, then cancer hit.  She and the doctors did all they could, but it wasn’t too long before she and everyone around knew her days were numbered. 

Carol's flowers after a Florida rain

I was worried that I would not get to see her and say goodbye, but we arrived in Florida before she died.  Her family had moved her into a hospital bed in the “Florida room” of the house (a Florida room is a room that used to be a porch but has been closed in).  By the time we got there she was pretty much confined to the bed.  She talked to us.  We laughed.  I read her greeting cards that people sent.  I asked a rock painting group if they would make her some rocks and they did – painted beautiful, elaborate rocks for a complete stranger!  She and I liked to look at those. 

As she got worse, I would just sit by her bed and hold her hand.  I would read to her from her Bible.  And I would sing hymns to her that I could remember from my childhood.  She was very religious, and at times when she was more alert she would join in with me on the songs.  I loved those moments when she joined in with her weak, tired voice.  I can’t say the 2 of us were the prettiest sounding duet ever heard, but we “got the job done”, as Carol might have said.

Sweet friend

She fought, and she fought hard.  Hospice nurses were amazed at her tenacity and will to live.  They kept warning that she would pass “any time”, but Carol kept defying their orders and lying in that bed, raising her leg, kicking off her covers, and every once in a while giving her family and friends a slight little smile.

Before she was really sick Carol told me that she had decided she was a BUTTERLY LADY.  She explained that meant that after she died, she would come back to visit all of us as a BUTTERFLY.  She told me to know that anytime a butterfly fluttered around me, it was her popping in to say hello. 

One day I had an idea.  I would make Carol’s room a BUTTERFLY room – make what would be her death bed a place of peace and comfort.  So, I bought a bunch of little butterflies at the craft store and put them on small magnets.  The ceiling over Carol’s hospital bed was made of metal, so I stuck those butterflies allllll above her.  If she opened her weary eyes, I wanted her to know that they were there for her – Carol the Butterfly Lady.

The ceiling above Carol's bed

Carol died the next evening.  Her husband was with her, and right after she passed he came to get us.  We sat with him and cried, saying goodbye to our sweet friend.

Nothing I did for my friend was extravagant.  I simply gave her the gift of time together, of holding hands, of reading aloud, singing, and BUTTERFLIES.  I like to believe that those simple kind acts made her last days easier to bear.  I like to think she knew those butterflies were up there above her.  And I believe what she told me – that she is now a BUTTERFLY LADY. 

Sweetly, almost every day we are in Florida, at least one butterfly flutters through our yard.  And every time I see them, I smile, and say, “Hi Carol!”.

 

Hi Carol

Cookie Kindness

Guys, I am so behind on kindness…  It makes my heart sad, really.  When my head (and my heart) are in a good place, a positive place, I can see kindness everywhere!  And I am inspired to DO kind things, which in turns puts me in an even better place.  Know what I mean?

But if I start feeling out of sorts, down, and buried with “life in general”, then I overlook the kindness around me.  It is as if I put on a pair of kindness blinders – I just MISS IT.  So, I, in turn, DO less kind things…  And that makes me feel even worse, even more “in my head” and consumed with “to do lists”.

It is a vicious cycle.  And it is one I need to work on breaking!  If I can just bring myself around to focus on kindness again, I know my spirits will lift and my eyes will be less foggy – and therefore my outlook on the world will be better!  I mean, that’s the whole PREMISE behind this project – share about kindness you see, do, or receive, and spread the kindness like a ripple to those who read about it.  SO HERE WE GO!

This is a kindness that I heard about way back in August, and I am just now writing about in November.  Sigh.  I apologize.  It is a sweet one and will inspire you!

My friend Vanessa was sick.  She was overwhelmed at work, had lost her voice, and was just having one of those days.  Her friend from college, Heather, was chatting with her over GChat, listening while Vanessa whined (her words, not mine!). 

Heather and Vanessa - friends for over 15 years but now live very far away from each other

Only, Heather did more than just listen.  Heather decided to cheer her friend up in a fun, silly way.  SHE SENT COOKIES!!  From all the way across the country!

Yup, cookies.  Vanessa said she was confused when a call came in and she didn’t recognize the caller ID, but she answered anyway.  “The guy on the other line said, ‘Vanessa, I’m downstairs with a cookie delivery.’  I was like, ‘Huh?  I didn’t order cookies…’ “.  So, Vanessa went to the lobby of her building and sure enough, there stood a cookie man!  The card with the cookies read, “Keep your chin up, buttercup!  Love from Wyoming!”.  Vanessa told me, “My reaction was to tear up.  Everyone has tough days that really seem silly the next day, but not everyone has amazing people who go out of their way to cheer them up.” 

Vanessa and Heather relaxing - now THAT DAY does not look stressful!

I totally agree!!  How many days do you notice a friend who is struggling, down in the dumps, and just having a tough time in general?  If you are like me, it is pretty often.  Yet not once have I thought, “I know what she needs – COOKIES!!”.  But seriously, consider it – wouldn’t ANY DAY get better with a couple of cookies??  I think so!  I had to ask Heather how she decided to treat her friend with such a swell gift, and she said, “I could tell she needed a pick-me-up.  I remembered seeing a cookies and milk delivery service in the DC area and thought, this is a perfect time to surprise her with something nice like that”.  Isn’t that the most thoughtful gesture??  I mean, flowers are nice to get and all, but COOKIES AND MILK takes the cake (pun intended).

I asked Vanessa why she thought her friend went out of her way to send the treats, and she told me, “Really, she just sent those cookies because that is who she is.  She is thoughtful, selfless, and wonderful. She is the founder of People Spread Love ( People Spread Love link) , a social movement that spreads love to individuals through simple notes of love composed by volunteers.  She literally dedicates her life to spreading love because her heart if overflowing with it, obviously.  She sends me handwritten cards all of the time, just because…  When my friend in Puerto Rico was diagnosed with terminal cancer, Heather was one of my biggest rocks from afar (Wyoming).  Ever since college this girl has brought nothing but sunshine and adventure into my life.”

I have not had the good fortune of meeting Heather in person, but just from how Vanessa describes her it is clear she is someone very special.  And listen to the kinds of things Heather does in her home town: “I do things most often in the Jackson, WY area (where I live) through the non-profit organization I started called People Spread Love. I organize random acts of kindness in the community on a monthly basis.  I give free hugs on occasion, leave Heart Reminders on trailheads, airplanes and park benches. Last winter we showed gratitude to our snowplow drivers.  We had the biggest snow fall in 100 years and we wanted to share our gratitude, so 5 volunteers and I got up at 3 am and brought coffee, donuts and held up signs to show them our appreciation. We were all pretty sleepy after that, but it was completely worth it. We have also shown gratitude to our postal workers, because they have so much stress in what they do, especially during the holidays.  So we hold up signs to show our appreciation while we wait in line for our packages.”  I don’t know about the rest of you reading this, but lightbulbs went off in my head when I heard the cool, kind things Heather and her group do!  There are so many opportunities to be kind in the world, we just need to seek them out. 

People Spread Love logo

People Spread Love looks like an amazing organization, one I want to get involved with.  The premise is quite simple as Heather explains it, “People Spread Love gave me an outlet to do kind things for people and to encourage others to do the same. The main purpose of what we do is write notes of love to those facing adversity all over the country and the world. We have Meet & Make public events where we write notes of love together as a community. The circumstances do not matter; whether you lost your job, your dog passed away, you have had a run of bad luck, you are lonely, you need appreciation for all you do, or are sick, we send love to all that need a little extra.”

How lucky Vanessa is to have such an amazing woman in her life.  Friends like the two of them – friends who are there for one another, listen, and act with compassion and love – are rare and valuable.  What I think is great is that Heather went out of her way and sent cookies on THAT DAY.  Like, it was not a horrible, no good, very bad day…  Her friend was feeling overwhelmed, grumpy, and didn’t have a voice, but it wasn’t like Vanessa had just gotten fired or received bad test results from the doctor.  It was “normal crap”, you know?  Vanessa said, “No matter how small the problem, the person experiencing it may feel it tenfold.  These little gestures are always so incredible to receive.  They also inspire those receiving the tokens of love to spread it forward.  It’s amazing what some cookies and big love can do.  Those cookies gave me a BIG AHA moment:  Work is work, my voice would come back eventually, but most importantly, I am beyond lucky to have people in my life to love and inspire me”.  I couldn’t agree more!!  You are so lucky to have a friend like Heather!

Fun times are even better when shared with great friends

P.S. – One part of this story that I thought was so funny is that the cookie order was actually wrong…  Heather had ordered CHOCOLATE MILK to go with the cookies, but for some reason the cookie guy didn’t deliver it.  So, while it all seemed so beautiful and perfect to Vanessa, in the background Heather was going, “Hey, where’s the milk??”.  😊

P.P.S. – Please make sure to check out the People Spread Love website and GET INVOLVED!  Like them on Facebook, their posts will inspire you.  Link to the website here:  http://peoplespreadlove.com/

Clean House Kindness

In November 2011, Felicia was newly separated from her husband.  She had three young kids, a stressful job, and was just starting to learn to navigate “solo” in the world (insert deep breath).  But she also had some super supportive friends who were bound and determined to make this transition easier for her.  Here is what she told me:

Felicia and kids in Disney - she thought THIS was the big event.  Little did she know what was waiting for her back home...

“Despite the challenging times, I had planned a Disney trip for my three kids and me. It was my first big adventure as a single parent. We spent a wonderful week in Florida, during my birthday week  (WINNING!!) and returned home to a most wonderful surprise.  A group of 10-15 of my close friends had gotten together and coordinated a mammoth effort to clean my home and give it a bit of a makeover. They greeted us as we pulled into the driveway.  I had no idea what was in store - I just thought they were welcoming us home with balloons and flowers. But then they proceeded to walk me through the house and show me all of their hard work. It looked like a model home, staged for the real estate market! Every room had been cleaned and re-organized and all of the clutter was gone. And the best part was – there were love notes left in various cabinets and drawers throughout the house, to remind me how loved I was.”

SURPRISE!!  Welcome home to your clean, love filled house!!

Isn’t that an amazing and kind surprise???  Her friends are awesome!!  They were people from all areas of her life - her family (Mom, sister and sister-in-law), sign language interpreter friends new and old, close girlfriends who had been supporting her through the separation, even some friends she had known since elementary school.  They all got together to make her life not only cleaner, but less stressful and more full of love.

When I asked her how the big surprise made her feel, she said, “I was speechless...awed...humbled.  I felt like I had just won the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes!  It was like they were standing at my door with a big check for me. I was surrounded in so much warmth, love and support. It was truly the most amazing kindness I had ever experienced.”

Facebook status after the big CLEAN HOUSE reveal :)

I asked Felicia to consider how her friends must have felt after surprising her.  She explained it so well, “When someone is going through a difficult time in life - divorce, loss of a loved one, loss of a job, etc, people often don't know what to do or how to help.  I was at one of the lowest of the low times in my life, and while I knew I had an amazing support system in place, people didn't know what to DO for me.  This was how they could help - they sacrificed their time (and their hands and knees) to scrub my house from top to bottom and make it a warm welcoming place for my kids and I to return to. They wanted to help and they sure did. They showed their love and support. I can only imagine how such a selfless act affected each and every one of them.”

The main premise of this Kindness Activist project is that when we hear about kind things that others do or receive, we are in turned inspired to be kind.  So I wondered if RECEIVING this amazing, generous kindness made Felicia want to “pay it forward” and be kind to someone else.  I was not surprised when she said, “ABSOLUTELY!  Most definitely!”

She says, “While I have always had a giving spirit, I was in a tough spot and really couldn't even take care myself.  But this act of love reminded me that I was going to be ok and that I was strong. It revived me.   There hasn't been another experience in my life that parallels this act of love and kindness in terms of the power it had to lift my spirits and make me feel loved. I am still humbled by the kindness they each contributed to.  And I know today as much as I did then, that I am a lucky girl and that I have some AMAZING people in my life!”

This photo of Felicia and kids captures it perfectly - L O V E.

Well Felicia, I agree with you.  That was an awesome gift of kindness that your friends and family gave you.  Thanks for being willing to share it with us and inspire OTHERS to be kind. 

If YOU have given or received kindness, please tell me about it!  I would love to be inspired by your story.  Email me at kindnessactivist@gmail.com .  And “like” Kindness Activist on Facebook!