kindness activist

kindness activist

Tuesday, December 24, 2024

Holidays Are For Everyone

In this season of plenty, this time of excess – lights, music, cookies, candy, wrapping paper, bows, turkeys…


It is easy to forget that there are some who have nothing.


And for them, instead of a season of joy and song, this season is one of cold. 


It’s easy to forget them.  And for some, sometimes easier to ignore them. 


Because acknowledging them means acknowledging the inequity in our country.  The sad reality that some have much, and some have none. 


We live in the 7th wealthiest county in America, Arlington, Virginia.  The average median income here is $132,380.


Yet, there are people who come to the Little Yellow Free Pantry outside our home 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. 


Some of our visitors have housing.  They may rent an apartment for their family.  Perhaps they are working 2, maybe 3 jobs.  But still that is not enough income to pay the rent, the utilities, the gas, and put food on the table.


Some of our visitors rent a room in a house.  They have a bed, a bathroom, but no access to a kitchen, only a small fridge, microwave, or hotplate in the room.


Some of our guests live in their cars.  One lives in his van – lost his home in a fire and had no insurance.  With these people, we see the back seats filled with all of their belongings – coat, pillow, food, toilet paper.


And some of our guests have no indoor place to call home.  They live in the woods, on the street, in a bus stop, in a store front after the business closes for the night.


It is COLD these days.  Tonight the low is 36 degrees, tomorrow 32.  Some people go into the shelter for the night but others brave the weather and stay outdoors.


During these cold spells, sometimes I quietly complain about having to go out and put food in the pantry.  On days it is raining, or the steps are icy, I sometimes get cranky.  Then I think, “Susan, you will be outside in the freezing weather for 5 minutes.  The people who need this food may be out in it all night.  Get to work”.


One of our guests is a very mild mannered, quiet, polite person who is experiencing homelessness.  They immigrated to America, and I am quite certain that living on the street is not what they imagined when they dreamed of a new life here.  They come for food and if I see them, I make sure to go out and talk and make a special bag for them.  You see, they collect food not only for themselves, but for another person who does not have housing and lives outdoors but is not healthy enough to come to the pantry. 


Yesterday when they came I noticed they had no gloves, no mittens.  “Your hands are cold!  Do you have mittens?” I asked.  “No ma’am, I do not,” they told me.


I had just given them a holiday gift – one for them and one for their friend.  And inside it – gloves.  They didn’t know it yet, but they had gloves…


You see, last month I begrudgingly took on a project.  I didn’t want to do it, just like sometimes I do not want to brave the cold to fill up the pantry.  But someone from a local synagogue reached out and asked if there was something they could do to help Kindness Activist.  They wanted to do a mitzvah.  But they had specific parameters and if it was to happen, it would be me who would have to organize it.


Only, I was in the midst of the Santa Project.  And the advent/countdown calendar.  And work.  And the usual tasks of life like paying bills and replying to emails.  And I didn’t think I could add another thing to my already full plate.


But I took a step back and looked at it all.  Here was a group of people who really wanted to help, they just needed a prompt, a mission.  Like so many, they wanted to get involved and give back but they weren’t sure how to do it.


So, I set about planning.


I decided that gifts for people experiencing homelessness would be perfect.  And not just any gift.  At the holidays many people are generous and hand out food or stocking hats or socks to people who are homeless.  But no – these needed to be PROPER PRESENTS.  Respectful gifts.  Gifts that would be useful but also acknowledge the recipient’s humanity, not just their need.


I asked the person from the synagogue if they would be willing to wrap the gifts.  Kindness Activist would supply everything – wrapping paper, boxes, tape, presents – they simply needed to provide the effort (and the scissors).


On December 15th they set to work making gift bags for 20 people.  In the bags are:

A stocking hat

A flashlight

Extra batteries

Lip balm

Beef jerky

A Starbucks canned drink

A deck of cards

Nail clippers

Tic Tacs

A chocolate bar

A pair of socks

Hand warmers

A pen

A notebook

A bag of Hershey kisses

And a holiday note or drawing from a local child


The volunteers wrapped each of the items so that the people who got them would have lots to open.  They lovingly put them into big, beautiful bags. 



And this week I got to hand out the first 2. 


The person was happy to receive them.  They didn’t have any idea what was inside and used the pretty bags to carry all of the other groceries they got – soup, meat, fruit, drinks, cookies.  I like to imagine what they must have thought when they got back to their spot and took a peek inside.  Did they open all of the gifts at once?  Did they savor them and open one per day? 


We have 18 more bags to hand out today and tomorrow.  I know one goes to the person who has no housing who comes to the pantry and I make coffee for – no sugar, just milk.  Last time they came they, like the other guest, had no mittens or gloves.  But in the freezing cold we saw that their hands were covered in nylon men’s socks.  Those could not provide much warmth but they are better than hands exposed to the frigid air.  It is not easy holding a piping hot cup of coffee and a cup of hot soup with socks on your hands, but they managed.


I am grateful.  Grateful for my home and my pillow and my running water and my mittens.


And I am embarrassed.  Ashamed to have so much when some have so little.


So I will share these gifts.  I will spread a message of happy holidays. 


And I will hope for better days ahead for these friends.


Special thank you to Congregation Etz Hayem for reaching out, wrapping many gifts, and helping make the holiday season a bit more bright for some members of our community.  And special thanks to the children who made artwork to be included in the packages.


Kindness Activist funds used:  $320.75 ($16.04 per gift)

The reminder that we all deserve joy and a little gift: priceless

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