5 1/2 Year Old Kindness

 I thought about waiting to share this story until after the entire acts of kindness related to it are finished, but I am excited to tell you about it, and I also like to write when things are still fresh in my memory.  So here is a quick update on…

 JUNE BUG’S KINDNESS HOT COCOA STAND!

If you follow Kindness Activist you will remember that recently a sweet little girl named June Bug hosted a hot cocoa stand to raise money for us!  In a short 2.5 hours, this little dynamo raised $1118.75 – all to be used to spread kindness!!!  (Note – that number is slightly higher than what was previously shared as a couple of donations for cocoa came in after the fact).

Since the cocoa stand was HER idea and since she put so much effort into it, of course my little friend is involved in deciding how the money will be used.  She and her mamma came over one evening to brainstorm ideas of how she would like to spread kindness.  Here are some of the things that she came up with:

-         Give gifts to the teachers and staff at her former pre-school (shhh, don’t tell them because this is still in the works, but “lip chap” is one of her ideas to treat them…)

-         Buy gifts for sick kids at Children’s National Hospital (where her mom was a nurse, and where she has been a patient)

-         Buy things for a classroom (we have chosen a local classroom that has 4 students, all with autism)

-         Pay for people’s meals at an iconic local restaurant – Weenie Beenie (I suspect that she wants to do this one because she wants to eat at Weenie Beenie…)

So, with those ideas to get us started, I picked June Bug up this weekend and we went shopping!

First stop – the grocery store to buy SNACKS for the classroom.  We had some ideas of what the students like (and allergies) from talking with the teacher, so June Bug picked out some terrific items.  She got juices, popcorn, tasty cereal bars, and goldfish crackers.  She even picked out some very special juice bottles with characters on top (we agreed that the students will love them!).

Treats for a classroom

Then off to Target.  But before we could even go inside, we saw something we needed to check out – a young woman selling painted rocks.  They were beautiful!  We talked to the artist and her mother, and it turned out that the woman was Deaf and was selling her artwork because her hearing aid had broken and she needs a new one.  Insurance won’t cover it, so she is raising money to purchase it.

The artist and the activist

It was hard to choose what to buy (there were so many pretty ones!) but June Bug picked a piece of watermelon rock and a rainbow with a cloud rock.  Fun!  We talked about who those would be for and she thought she may give one to her “Sister Cousin” and keep one for herself.  Later that plan changed to give both to her cousins.  So sweet.

Once inside Target, we started in the BOOK section, because books were on her list of things that kids in the hospital needed.  She very deliberately looked for and chose books that she has at home, as she knows those.  “Oh, this is a good one!!!  Let me show you Kindness Susan!” she told me as she turned page after page of a book about a fish.  We ended up with a few books, one nice sticker book (which she has at home, too), 3 coloring books, and crayons to go with those. 

We grabbed some sensory toys for the classroom and the markers that the teacher had requested, then ON TO THE TOY DEPARTMENT!

I feared this part might be difficult.  I mean, June Bug is 5 years old (5 ½ if you ask her)…  Imagine shopping up and down the toy aisles looking only for things for other people and not yourself at that age…

But she was great!  We had written down some ideas of what she thought children at the hospital would want, so we started with one of those: a doll (how to choose?  But she did!).  Then another thing on her list: a stuffy.  She went for a chocolate brown teddy bear, one of the softest I have ever felt.  She decided it would be ok for her to snuggle that in the store and the car on the way home, and I agreed.  She also chose a game, some cool balls, some small wooden train cars, and I talked her into a little lap art desk set and a Rubik’s cube (“For the older kids, June Bug!” I told her.)  I talked her OUT of a musical piano and a MICROPHONE (“June Bug, I am not so sure the nurses would like the children to have those…  Don’t you think they would be a bit, oh, I don’t know, NOISY for a hospital???”)

She added some “lip chap” for the sick children, then our cart was quite full and we thought we were done.  But I remembered the ROCKS.  “June Bug, would you maybe like to give the rocks to people HERE at the store?” I asked her.  She smiled her great big smile and her eyes twinkled.  “Yes, Kindness Susan!!”.  She loved the idea. 

But who to give them to… 

I saw a woman in a wheelchair looking at some shoes.  I pointed her out and asked if perhaps she would be a good rock recipient.  June Bug thought she would, so we approached.  I told her before we got to the woman that she needed to speak up nice and loud, and she did.  She explained we had a very pretty rock that we would like to give her, and handed the watermelon rock to the woman. 

The woman was so happy!  “Oh my goodness, I COLLECT ROCKS!” she told us.  “And this one is beautiful!!”  June Bug and I were both so pleased that we had chosen her to give the rock to.   I am not sure which made the woman happier – getting to talk to a delightful young girl, or adding a pretty rock to her collection.  Either way, June Bug’s gift made her day.

For the 2^nd rock we hunted down someone working in the store.  June Bug decided it should go to someone working hard, and we found the right person: a woman putting the carts and baskets away.  She, too, was delighted to get a gift from a young Kindness Activist.  She asked June Bug her name and shared hers – CiCi.  She was very thankful (and I am quite sure that rock created a kindness ripple was spread throughout the store after we left when CiCi told all of her co-workers what had happened).

June Bug was in charge of checking everything out at the self-check (sorry Target guy, she didn’t mean to ring up those items twice and make you come over and assist us not one time but two…). 

Some of June Bug's excellent purchases

After I dropped my little friend back at her house, I thought about the “coincidences” that had happened that afternoon.  We noticed a person selling rocks outside Target (which I have never seen before).  We stopped to chat.  The person was Deaf, and I am a sign language interpreter so could communicate easily with her.  We could donate to help fund her new hearing aid.  And out of everyone in the store, we happened to choose a woman who COLLECTS ROCKS to gift one to.

But really, I don’t think those things are coincidences.  I love when things like that happen.  I honestly believe that they happen to all of us, and much more often than we know.  If we open our eyes and our hearts and pay attention to the world around us, we notice them.  Try it!

My friend and I still have much more to do – we need to deliver the gifts we have purchased, get the teacher gifts prepared, go to Weenie Beenie…

I am looking forward to it!  Spending time with young, KIND kids is inspiring.  Kids get it.  They are great role models.

Kindness Activist funds spent:

Snacks and toys for the classroom: $63.71

Rocks: $30 (we paid more than the asking price, and purchased 2 more as we were leaving the store)

Things for sick kids at the hospital: $191.99

Getting to spend the afternoon seeing kindness through the eyes of a child: priceless.

All Are Welcome

I was thinking about what to name this story…  Several possibilities popped into my head:

“Two Worlds Colliding”

“Coming In, Going Out”

And others in that same vein.  The concept being – opposite things happening simultaneously.

But the more I considered it, I realized that my framework for the story was entirely off.  It was not opposites.  Nothing “collided”.  Instead, it is a story of coexistence.  Of humanity, and how we are all alike and all are welcome.

So that is what it shall be called.  “All Are Welcome”.

Now the story.

Yesterday Kindness Activist hosted a very fun event – June Bug’s Hot Cocoa Stand.  It was a fund raiser and the brainchild of a lovely neighbor and friend, five-year-old June Bug.  Wait, she is precisely 5 ½, because, as she told me with a gleam in her eyes when she arrived to prepare for the big event, “Kindness Susan!  Today is my half birthday!!”.

June Bug conceived of this grand idea while volunteering one afternoon with her mamma.  As they worked to seal packets of rice, little June Bug hatched her plan.  A HOT COCOA STAND.

It all happened yesterday and it was so fun.  Many, many people came – including lots of June Bug’s family, friends, and classmates.  The sun shone.  The cocoa flowed.  The toppings and cookies were plentiful.  The fire pit crackled and s’mores and marshmallows were enjoyed.

We started at 2:00 pm, and about an hour into the festivities I saw a man waiting at the corner for the light to change to cross the street.  I recognized him as a pantry guest.  I rushed to talked to him before he crossed and let him know that today was a special day and we were serving hot chocolate.  “Would you like some?” I asked.  Well, the smile was enough of an answer, followed by, “Hot chocolate?  Well yeah!!!”.  I brought him over to the stand and grabbed him a cup.  I gave the server, June Bug’s grandma, a little look that I think she understood – this one is on the house.  I took him to the topping bar, got him some cookies, and left him to enjoy his treats.

When I saw him next his cup was empty and the cookies were gone.  He politely asked, “May I have another cup?”.  Well sure!  Seconds on hot chocolate, seconds on cookies. 

He stayed for quite a long time.  I think he chatted with a few people.  At one point I saw him sitting on the sidewalk, taking in the sunshine, his legs stretched out in front of him.  And I remembered – this was the Pantry guest that happened to walk by a year ago during the 2^nd birthday party we hosted for the Little Yellow Free Pantry.  We invited him to join in the fun that day, too, and he happily came under the canopy we had set up to try and keep us dry from the rain.  He ate snacks, drank drinks, and chatted that day, too.

The “completed-ness” of the situation made my heart happy.  Here were guests coming to support June Bug and Kindness Activist, pitching in far more than a cup of cocoa was actually worth.  Donating for the CAUSE – spreading kindness.

And here was a man who is a recipient of that very kindness when he stops by the pantry a few times a week.  He likely spends much of his time alone.  I have never seen him with anyone, and I doubt he gets invited to places or parties. 

And there we were.  All together.  All enjoying the weather and the conversation and the cocoa.

Because when you think about it, we are all the same.

And ALL ARE WELCOME.

 

P.S. – As I was sitting down to write tonight, our doorbell rang.  That is not uncommon around here, but it was getting a bit late.  I answered the door and found a man on the porch, another pantry guest.  He is very sweet – I often heat up meals for him.  I assumed that is what he was stopping by for tonight, though I don’t think he has ever rang the bell before.  I noticed right away that he was sporting a warm stocking cap he had picked up from Project Warmth.  We don’t share a common language, so the conversations between us are rudimentary.  I pointed to his warm hat, smiled, and said, “Nice!  Good!”.  He smiled back and pointed to Project Warmth, showing me where he had gotten it.  “Today – no,” he said, touching his head, explaining that before he picked that hat up, he didn’t have one.  Then he turned my attention to something sitting at the foot of our sidewalk.  “TV??” he asked.  “Oh, no,” I tried to explain, “Not mine.  No.”  He smiled and said, “No!  Me!  Find.  TV?”.  I could tell it was a computer monitor, but thought I should come out and check it anyway.  We walked down the steps and I examined it.  “No,” I said, using the snapping fingers “rats” gesture, “Computer.”

He smiled.  He had hoped that the treasure he must’ve found on the side of the road was a television.  He had no need for a monitor.  “You want?” he asked politely.  So kind – sharing his finds.  “No thank you.  Have,” I explained. 

I offered dinner, he said today he had eaten.  We said good night.  He got back on his old bike, picked up the monitor, and road off into the darkness.

He had just stopped by for a little tech support.  Because he knows, all are welcome.

From Babies to Birds (And So Much More)

I have not written any stories recently of how Kindness Activist funds have been used.  I am sorry about that!  I guess I DO have a good reason – I have been busy with Kindness Activist work!

But I will pause this evening to tell the stories of how some funds have been used.  After all, that is one of the main premises of Kindness Activist – if we talk openly about kindness and share kind acts we see, do, or receive – we can spread kindness ripples.  Those ripples will continue to spread when people inspired by the stories we share go out into the world and spread some kindness of their own!  Ripple, ripple, ripple…

Here is how some Kindness Activist funds have been used.

Having a baby, the first baby, is exciting!  But it can also be scary and lonely, especially if your family lives in a different country and you and your partner are not surrounded by aunts, uncles, siblings, grandparents, and cousins.  So, when a woman in our community was expecting her first child, a sweet friend planned a baby shower.  We collected many amazing donations of items from neighbors – stroller, car seat, blankets, clothing, diapers, wipes, books, toys – it was beautiful!  So many kind donations.  One thing that we did not get was a changing pad that the organizer thought would last long enough.  Som Kindness Activist pitched in for that. 

I am happy to report that the baby arrived December 11^th and is doing well (so is mamma).  It takes a village, and this little infant will have that.

Welcome to the world little one

 Kindness Activist funds used:  $25.43

  

Sometimes, it’s the little things.  Acts of kindness don’t have to be pricey, nor do they have to be grand gestures.  Even small acts of kindness can make a person feel special.  And that’s why Kindness Activist refilled a neighbor’s bird food supply recently when he ran out.  He feeds the birds everyday, it gives him joy.  And is on a limited budget.  He was happy to get some food for his friends!

 

Kindness Activist funds used:  $10.27

 

December is an ultra-busy month here at Kindness Activist.  We have a countdown to Christmas calendar on our front that has treats for kids everyday from December 1 – 24, we host a community caroling event, and our BIG annual project, The Santa Project, is all-consuming. 

 

One evening we were at Target buying gifts for the Santa Project and fun things to put on top of the wrapped gifts.  We used a gift card when we check out, and it just so happened that it had a strange amount left on it.  “We will pay $68.96 with a gift card, credit card for the rest,” we explained to the cashier.  “Wow!!  $68.96?  I wish I had a gift card worth that much!” she said as she smiled at us.  We chatted a bit and finished up.

Only, we were not finished.  My partner David said, “Hey, wouldn’t it be fun…” and our plan was hatched!  We checked with a manager to make sure it would not get the cashier into any trouble if we gave her a gift card, then went through another aisle and purchased a gift card for the exact same amount as ours had been - $68.96.  Then we got back in line with the first cashier.

I look exhausted here, and we were only 8 days into 
the calendar and a looong way from the end of 
the Santa Project :) 

She saw us waiting and I noticed a look of slight panic on her face.  When it was our turn, she said, “Is something wrong?  Did I ring something twice??”, looking worried.  “Oh no, just the opposite!” we said before we started “serenading” her with a carol.    

She was so happy and she couldn’t believe her luck.  We saw her again a few days later and she remembered us.  I asked if she had used the gift card yet. “Nope, I am saving it to buy gifts for my family!” she said.

Kindness ripples.  We were kind to her, and she will be kind to her family.  The ripples flow.

Kindness Activist funds spent:  $68.96

 

The Washington DC Metro is a very diverse, welcoming, and growing area.  Immigrants arrive from countries all over the world – hoping to make the United States of America their home.  Recently, a mother and her sweet daughter came to the US from Cameroon right before the little 5th girl’s birthday.

 

Neighbors helped to find furniture for the apartment to make it more like a home, clothes for them, art supplies for the girl, and get them generally settled in.  But birthdays are special, so a sweet neighbor organized a little birthday party in a neighborhood park. 

 

It turned out to be a beautiful sunny day in September and the children laughed and played and ran around the park.  The birthday girl looked beautiful in her fancy attire, and the celebration was grand.  Kindness Activist pitched in for pizza and little gifts for guests. 

 

Welcome to America, little friend.  May every birthday be full of delight and wonder.

Unicorns, pizza, and much more

Kindness Activist funds used:  $97.87

I was having an online conversation one evening and the person on the other end typed this, “I am trying to save money for a trip back to the Midwest, where my mom lives.  She is in a nursing home.  She’s been diagnosed with end stage dementia and being looked after by my brother and sister who still live nearby.  Our mom is 89 and we don’t know what the future holds.  I am trying to save money for a round trip ticket to attend her death, which grieves me, but I’m here on the East Coast and she is in the Midwest.  It’s a different world.”

 

As soon as I read the message, I knew Kindness Activist would buy an airline ticket.  My mom died in 2002 and I was fortunate to get to spend lots and lots of time with her (in the Midwest) during the last year of her life.  We traveled, we laughed, we danced, we talked, and we were all around her as she took her last breaths. I realize that is a privilege that many do not have, but I wanted to ensure that this person could at least go see their mother while she was still alive.

 

So, Kindness Activist offered to cover the airfare.  As we were working out logistics, the person told me, “Susan, I would so much like to see my mom again before she dies. I love her so much, and she always loved me.  I will with so much gratitude accept the Kindness ticket…  I’ve been saving to return for a funeral visit and grieving that I can’t make another live visit.  This would be another star in my heaven.”

 

When they returned to Arlington, they wrote to me, “I am home!  I got in late last night, but with the memory if a sweet reunion!  I’m pleased to report that although my mom’s memory is fading, she recognized me instantly,”. 

What an honor to be able to grant a visit with a loved one.  Because of amazing support from people around the country, Kindness Activist could make this wish happen.  (And, if I may “preach” a bit here, please visit YOUR mother if you still have one.  Write her a card or letter and mail it via the good old fashioned postal service.  Call and talk to her on the phone.  Mothers don’t last forever here on earth, only in our hearts.  So please make sure you tell yours that you love her today.

Kindness Activist funds spent:  $368.80

 

 

P.S. – stories of the 2023 Countdown Calendar and the Santa Project coming soon!

The Sounds of The Season

You don’t think of ADVENT CALENDARS as having a “sound”. 

I mean, they are inanimate objects.  Simple or ornate paper creations with tiny doors that peel open daily – December 1 – 24 – to reveal a small “prize” each day.  Most offer a small piece of chocolate (usually of questionable quality…).  But all offer tradition.  A sense of holiday.  Something to look forward to.  A bit of routine.  And a of excitement for what is just around the corner – creeping closer, closer, closer day by day – Christmas.

But one thing they do not have is a “sound”.

Unless, that is, they are LIFE-SIZE.

And not made of paper, but wood.

And not on a mantle or dining room table, but on the purple porch of an almost 100-year-old yellow house on the corner of a very busy intersection.

In that case, with that particular advent calendar, many, many sounds are on offer.

The sound of little feet scampering up 6 steps.  Then back down.

The sound of small wooden doors – various sizes, shapes, and colors – opening, closing, opening, closing.

The sound of giggles and laughter.

The sound of the doorbell dinging or tiny hands knocking every couple of hours to report that today’s cubby is empty and could it please be refilled.

The sound of wrapping paper being ripped away to reveal the magic that is today’s treat.

The sound of chatter as children sitting on the top step eating whatever deliciousness they discovered behind the door of the day.

The sounds of crying as a tiny piece of today’s toy treasure drops between the cracks of the old steps and disappears into darkness (and the sound of old bones creaking as Miss Susan ventures under the cobweb filled porch to try and retrieve the prize).

The sounds of friends – old and new – staying and chatting after meeting up and discovering what was behind today’s door.

The sound – over and over and over day after day after 24 days – of “Good morning friend!  Do you know what day it is day??  The numbers look like…The door is pink and the handle is blue…”.

The sound of whistles, freshly unwrapped, being blown as loudly as possible on the porch, down the steps, down the sidewalk, across the street, and on and on and on the way.

The sound of “Merry Christmas – thank you Miss Susan and Mr. David” for 20 days straight by 2 little visitors who faithfully visited until vacation plans ended their visits before the final cubby door could be opened.

The sounds of joy and curiosity and love and friendship and community and holiday and glee and wonder and tradition.

The sounds of the season.

Total Kindness Activist funds used:  $977.83, which sounds like an awful lot until you break it down:

$40.74 per day for 24 days

Average of 55 visitors per day

.74 cents per visitor per day

Value - priceless

We Never Know

I had a reminder one recent afternoon that life is short.  And that people are experiencing things that we cannot see from the outside, and we should treat everyone with kindness and respect.

I was in the dining room and heard my partner David talking to someone on the front porch.  That is not unusual – we have people drop by often to bring items for the Little Yellow Free Pantry or to pick up something we are giving away or just to stop and chat.  I peeked outside to see who he was talking to, and saw it was a woman with a large bag at her feet.

I popped outside to join them.  The woman explained that she had some clothing to donate – men’s clothes, and some shoes.  Immediately I envisioned the current state of our attic – filled to the brim with donated clothing that was supposed to be sold at this summer’s Kindness Fundraiser Yard Sale, but the event was postponed until next spring due to rain.

“Ahhh…” I mumbled, thinking, “How do I explain that we are not accepting clothing donations right now without being rude?”. 

“Your husband explained that you aren’t taking donations right now.  That’s ok,” she said quietly.

I gave her the usual spiel about how the sale was cancelled this summer so we are way over-stocked.  She listened, then said, “I understand…  I spent all afternoon getting this together…”.

Those moments are hard.  What to say?

Then she quietly said, “My husband just died,” and the tears started to flow.

Ahhh – these were her husband’s clothes.  She had spent all afternoon sorting and folding and bagging his things.  If she is anything like me, she probably held the shirts close, sniffed them, remembered where she had seen him wear them…

The situation had changed. 

This woman was giving not only to help others, but to help herself heal. 

I asked permission to hug her and she gladly accepted.  David and I said that of course, we would love the clothing and boots.  She was uncomfortable with that – we had made it clear that we are not accepting things right now.  But given this circumstance – of COURSE we would accept the gifts.

We helped her unload her car and I asked questions about her husband.  I didn’t want to make her more sad or be nosy, but I figured if the tables were turned I would wish for opportunities to tell people about David.

He was only 70 years old.  Had a physical just a few days before he died.  They were on vacation – first one in a long time due to Covid.  She had just retired a couple of months earlier…  And he died very quickly.  Paramedics worked an hour to revive him, but he was gone.

We stood in the frigid air and talked a few minutes.  She is very much like me – no children, no family in the area.  And now alone.  In a house full of her love of 40 years possessions.

We don’t know what anyone is going through.  Be gentle with one another.  And celebrate every moment you have on earth. 

Kindness Ripples From A Stranger

Who would think that unpacking boxes of donated food could make a person cry…

And yet this evening, it has.

I was out of town over the weekend and the Pantry Crew took over pantry duty for me.  They are a crack bunch of humans who bring in donations and fill the pantry.  You see, since the LYFP has been in existence for 2 ½ years now, people have come to rely on it and know that if they need something, it is a resource.  So, when we are not here to take care of it, the Pantry Crew takes over.

As I was waiting for my Lyft to take me to the airport on Thursday, the Amazon driver stopped and dropped off some boxes.  I rushed to put them inside before jumping in my ride.  And the Pantry Crew brought more boxes that arrived while I was gone.  Now that I am back home, I have begun the task of opening boxes and putting the donations onto the storage shelves.

And that’s what brought me to tears…

People are donating in memory of E.A. Raven.

 

I told the story of this amazing human last week.  She was the “patron saint” of the Little Yellow Free Pantry – a complete stranger who must’ve heard about Kindness Activist by reading about us in the Washington Post or seeing the story about us on “On The Road With Steve Hartman”.  However she heard about our mission, she supported it wholeheartedly and gave very, very generously.  When her sister, another stranger to me, reached out to tell me that she had died, I cried.

 

And this evening donations coming in bearing her name made me tear up again.

 

Cheesy mashed potato cups.  Go-Go Squeeze.  Toilet paper.  A summer sausage. Shelf stable meals.  Soup.  Maple Flavored Spam…  And more.

 

All in memory of E.A. Raven.

May her generosity and commitment to making the world a better place continue to create kindness ripples near and far. 

Thanks, E.A. Raven.  Your work continues.  You are remembered.

(If you would like to donate items to the Little Yellow Free Pantry, the Amazon wish list is here:  Little Yellow Free Pantry Wish List

You can sort the list by priority (high to low) to see what is most needed. 

What is urgent as of November 6 is jars of peanut butter of any brand and type (we are out), cans of vegetables and fruit, cake mixes of any brand and flavor (we are out), and shelf stable meals (like Hormel Compleats or something similar – we go through a lot of those). 

THANK YOU.

 

 

 

 

Mysterious, Generous, Beautiful Kindness

Kindness Activist learned of a death in the “family” today. 

I am sorry to share that the beloved, magical, and mysterious E.A. Raven has died.

E.A. Raven was what could be called the “patron saint” of Kindness Activist.  She contributed so much over the last 10 months.

And yet – she remained a mystery. 

We never met.  I was never sure how she had found out about our work. 

But she was one of the most enthusiastic supporters ever.

I think it all started in December of 2022.  The annual Santa Project was underway – an event that invites children to write and mail letters to the North Pole right from our house in South Arlington, Virginia.  In 2022, 229 letters were written to Santa.  And each and every one of those children who wrote received a personal letter from Santa and at least one gift that they had asked for (most kids got 2 or 3 things).

The Santa Project is a herculean task, and last year I harnessed the power of the people and ASKED FOR HELP.  I made an Amazon wish list with things the letter writers were asking for and shared the link to the list.

That’s when the magic started.

Packages started arriving with Amazon notes signed “E.A. Raven”.  And not just one package, no, the mystery donor granted wish after wish after wish.  I was astounded and oh so thankful.

But the deliveries didn’t stop after Christmas was over.  Instead, they became even more frequent…  E.A. Raven would send food and toiletries to help stock the Little Yellow Free Pantry, a pantry outside our home that helps neighbors experiencing food insecurity make ends meet.  E.A. Raven followed the wish list for the Little Yellow Pantry and sent so, so, so many wonderful things.

One thing I loved about her gifts for the pantry is that she was not judgmental in the least.  Many people who donate food wouldn’t think to donate something “extravagant” like jelly or cake frosting or cookies.  But E.A. Raven and I agreed – everybody deserves good food, and that includes a treat now and then.  Food pantries shouldn’t be just cans of tuna and green beans.

She and I developed a friendship, I like to think.  A friendship, even though we never met. 

And even though I didn’t know who this beautiful human was. 

I don’t know how she found out about Kindness Activist.  Maybe she saw the story on CBS News?  Maybe she read a piece in the Washington Post?  However she heard about our mission, she was 100% on board and supported our work with a passion.

I didn’t have any way to communicate with E.A. Raven.  Well, no way except to scan the codes on the Amazon gift notes included in the boxes and write her thank you notes.  I loved writing them.  I would thank her for whatever she sent, then sometimes tell her about the weather we were having.  Remind her how grateful we were for her donations.  Sometimes my messages were too long (there is a character limit to Amazon thank you s) and I would have to write “cont” on one and write more on the next note. 

I tried to get some details from her, to solve the mystery.  I wanted to send her a Kind Is Cool t-shirt – asked her size and where to send it.  No reply. 

 

I must confess that my friends and I were a bit obsessed about this stranger.  We fantasized about who this wonderful woman must be.  At first, we thought she was using a nom de plume – after all – E. A. Raven sounds a bit like Edgar Allen (Poe), author of The Raven…

 

I resorted to Googling her.  I found a Facebook page that I thought was hers that was meant to showcase her writing, but it was closed.  Still, I sent a message.  No response. 

 

I found some information online about a person who I thought was her…  Perhaps this was her – a woman who held a patent…

 

But really, the mystery was part of the allure.  Not knowing who she was somehow made the boxes and boxes and boxes that arrived full of donations even more special.

 

A few months ago, one of the notes included with a donation explained that she was going to be in the hospital having a procedure done.  I was worried, as were the members of the Pantry Crew.  We wanted to send her flowers and a get well card.  I asked again for her address in a thank you, no reply.

 

She didn’t send any donations for about a month after the surgery.  We were nervous – was she ok??? 

 

Because you see, it was not the donations we were missing.  It was our friend.  Our far away, never before seen, mysterious magical friend.

 

She sent a few more things.  She included a sweet note that said she was in rehab now and it was difficult to order off Amazon using her phone.  I wished on a star for her to get well.

 

Today I got an email from another stranger, E.A. Raven’s sister.  She broke the news: “My sister Betty Raven loved donating items to your charity.  Sadly, she passed a week ago.  I wanted to inform you so that you understand why she stopped donating.”

 

I cried.  Cried for a woman I had never met but was so very thankful for.  I asked her sister when the memorial service would be because I hoped I could take time to go and honor her.  Sadly, the services have already happened.  And strangely, she died on Mary Day, the anniversary of my mom’s death in 2002.

 

Her sister sent a link to the obituary.  It was not until her death that I found out exactly who E.A. Raven was.  And boy oh boy, was she a powerhouse.  She paved the way for women who followed in her footsteps.  I wish I could have met her.  I think we would’ve gotten along swimmingly.

 

Rest in peace, E.A. Raven.  You brightened our lives with your mystery.  You made us smile with your sweet notes.  You taught us that we can be friends with those we have never met.  You fed many, many people in this community.  You were a shining example of KINDNESS. 

 

Thank you.

Here is a link to her inspirational obituary:  E.A. Raven

Number 365

Our Delegate to the Virginia Assembly, Alfonso Lopez, stopped by this evening.  His mission was to put up a yard sign on our busy corner (we are squarely in his team so he knows that ask gets a “yes”). 

But while he was here, we took time to chat.  Talked about the upcoming elections.  Talked about the repair to the porch David is working on.  Talked about the family arriving in America soon that needs temporary housing.  What an honor to have direct access to someone who represents us in government.  Not all Americans have that privilege, and I am thankful we do.

As we talked, I remembered that I have never shared an important story that involves Alfonso.  There are many reasons it has not been written about – time to sit down and compose being a factor.  But the main reason is this:  talking about yourself is difficult.  It can come across as boasting, which is a trait that I do not admire. 

But then I thought, by NOT sharing this story, I am not giving Alfonso the gratitude and respect that he deserves for honoring me in such a special and significant way.  And by not sharing it, I miss an opportunity to spread some kindness ripples. 

So – here’s the story…

On February 12, 2023 we hosted the 2^nd birthday party for the Little Yellow Free Pantry.  I invited the community, and my sister even flew in from Omaha to be a part of the celebration.  We had hoped for a sunny, chilly day full of laughter and cupcakes and cookies.  Instead, what we got was a very cold, rainy day – but still full of laughter and cupcakes and cookies.

It rained super hard.  We had a canopy set up and guests huddled under it around the fire pit.  Kids created crafts (with glitter, lots of glitter!!) on the covered back porch.  We drank hot cocoa and hot tea.  One of David’s jobs was to periodically poke the underside of the canopy with a broom handle to move the puddles that had formed onto the ground.  Once the puddle he was getting rid of splashed right into the firepit – smoke and ashes flew everywhere.  Cue the laughter…

One pantry guest who is without housing came by to get food and we invited him into the celebration.  He sat right down and chatted with the other everyone.  It was a cold day, but fun.

Late in the afternoon, State Representative Alfonso Lopez showed up.  And he brought with him a large blue folder, inside of which was a formal print of House Joint Resolution 365 – commending me, Susan Thompson-Gaines, for my work as a Kindness Activist.  Makes me tear up even thinking about it.

I don’t do this work for accolades.  I don’t do it to be recognized or applauded. 

I do kindness work because it makes my heart happy, and it makes the world a kinder place.  And really, don’t we all want happy hearts and a kind place to live?

Alfonso read the resolution aloud, and a kind neighbor videoed some of it and shared it with me, which I will share in the link here.

Alfonso Lopez Reading House Joint Resolution No. 365

Thank you Alfonso.  I am humbled and I am honored.  Maybe someday I will have an actual Kindness Activist OFFICE instead of working off the very full dining room table at home.  When that happens I can frame and hang this beautiful piece of parchment and hang it on the wall.

Until then, I will keep up the kindness.  Even on days when it is hard, and there feels like too much to juggle.  I would like to think that me finding this passion and diving into it so deeply would make my parents proud.  Wish they could see this Joint Resolution…  My dad would’ve photocopied this puppy 2 dozen times and handed out copies to all of his buddies (he might’ve even faxed it to a few of them…), and my mom most certainly would’ve cried when she saw it.

Go out there and be kind, friends.  It doesn’t cost you anything.  And it can honestly make a dent in changing the world.

Thanks. 

 

P.S. – I just noticed tonight that it is House Joint Resolution Number 365.  I think that means 365 days in a year.  As in, be kind 365.

 

#KindnessActivist   #JustBeKind   #BeKind365

 

Chips of Kindness

I put out a call recently asking for donations for the Little Yellow Free Pantry that we have outside our home, a pantry that feeds so many people in the community. 

And many, many people heard the call and responded.  Thank you. 

The donations have been coming in, making me smile each and every time.  The shelves in our basement that hold pantry supplies are no longer bare.  My wish was that we could stock up really good NOW, in October and November.  Because once the “busy season” starts (the annual Santa Project, where kids come to our home and write and mail letters to Santa, then he writes each and every one back and gets them something they asked for), I won’t have the time or energy to focus on the pantry.  It has to be ready to sort of “run itself” for that period.   

I wanted to take a moment to tell you the story of a new pantry guest.  I love to share stories of people who visit the pantry so that you have an idea of where the amazing things you donate are going.

A new guest showed up recently.  She is a sweet woman, tiny in stature, an immigrant.  She moved into the community with her son not long ago.  I saw her at the pantry and went up to talk.  She is very quiet and reserved. 

I explained that the food was for everyone.  She smiled and lowered her head, shaking it to say “no”.  I tried again.  “No, really, it is free!  It is for everyone, please take what you would like.”  Again, a shy “no”.

She asked if I knew of a place that she might be able to rent and explained that she and her child are currently living in a nearby hotel, which is eating up all of the money they have.  The boy is enrolled in school and she would like to stay in the same district.  I told her I would put some feelers out to see if I could find any leads.  She left with just a couple of cans of food.

I saw her again a few days later.  Again, I offered food, and again, she shyly declined.  But then she explained that she felt bad taking the food without giving something in return.  Was there anything she could do to help, she asked.

We agreed that she would come back the next day and volunteer.  Before she left, I begged her to take some food.  The only thing she asked for was CHIPS for her son.  “He likes chips,” she said quietly.  I rushed to the storage area and came back with chips, soup, chili, tuna, and a few other cans.  She was embarrassed to be offered so much.  “Give it to others, please, share with others,” she told me.  She left with a few cans of food and bags of the coveted chips.

She came back the next day just as she promised.  I put her to work hanging up many Halloween costumes that had been donated.  She did a terrific job getting them all organized. 

This woman is someone who benefits from your generosity.  This proud, shy, smart, scared woman.  She is starting life over here with her child.  And because of generous donors to the Little Yellow Free Pantry, she knows she has a safety net and does not need to go to bed hungry.

I have a lead on an apartment for her thanks to an amazing realtor.  I hope to see her again soon so that I can share it.  Our community needs people like her.  People brave enough to uproot themselves and move to a new place to find a better life.  People willing to help out and give back.  People with heart.

Thank you for being so supportive of the work of Kindness Activist.  Because of YOU, we can create kindness ripples one at a time.

If you would like to donate to the Little Yellow Free Pantry, the Amazon wish list can be found here: Little Yellow Free Pantry Wish List

We are currently low on honey, single serving cups of soup of any kind, and peanut butter.  We need canned meat of any kind and soup of any kind.